it's official
Dr Mahathir has left
i know i never write anything on this, but that does not mean i'm not sentimental about it
it does mean something to me, i feel for his departure
i am sentimental about this
i love that old man

goodbye Tun Mahathir..
have fun with your grandchildren!!

-u know wat would be cool? since dr M now has all the time to read, cook, sleep, play, surf.. it might be possible for him to drop by in few malaysian blogs n leave a note. and coming to mine would be totally out of this world. plsla dont come here, i'm a perfect definition of 'melayu alpa' - no discussion on war, no sentiment about local politics at all, no full lenght report of wat merdeka means to me..

my bro, yeh is coming back from perth soon
maybe for good.
too much pressure there, accelerated course program kills la i tell u,
and being part of a handful of filthy rich community, when u're not one, doesnt help either. not saying that they're bunch of snobs n doesnt know any better, but these spoon fed kids just dont seem to understand, that some, or most are not born on a bed of roses like them.
i pity yeh cos he's in a middle of a huge dilemma.
to stay, or to be home, where everything is more familiar.
not many get a chance like him, after spm, fly straight, with parents money
tak payah susah2 tunggu scholarship, or reply for matrics
but not many can take the pressure he's going through..
from a humble n almost homogenous all malay boys school, to an interracial, co-ed community, with every single one of them driving their own sports car and live in their very own family banglos.
he might be mad if he reads this entry
but no one blame him if he cant take it really
shed all ur machoness and decide for the best.
it's ur future.

on the other hand, i pity papa as well
even mama
who has been loosing sleep over this matter
i sense regret
i sense frustration
i sense worry
but as mama puts it, again and again, no use pondering on the past.
guess they were a little bit too excited about sending yeh abroad that they took the deathly jump, putting him through an accelerated course for engineering, and settling him with those 'no-worries' kids who're taking buss admin (sorry to offend, but we cant deny that engineering course n buss admin has a huge diff in the amt of efforts required, eh?)

afterall, the ex rate is simply killingla, from 2.2 when he first landed there, to 2.8 now..
balikla adikku oi
let's crowd the small house
and join us in the toilet sharing
5 (3 boys)to a toilet wouldnt be that bad..........

i just love the scene at the office carpark today
i saw at least 10 ppl caressing, flaunting and talking about their cars..
so much passion and respect they have for their machine
and really dont mind the loud music from those cars..
rasa mcm tgh raya apa ntah
simple brighten my morning

it's ramadhan
and i'm so glad i'm back at home
last yr was much of an experience. i've read everywhere about puasa in hostel, in dorms, during uni yrs. But i guess my puasa in brissie was one of a kind. It was the worst and yet the best experience. Oh well, no more braving the brissie summer heat for a decent kilo of halal meat or the staple kicap manis ABC which is rudely MANIS. No more searching for the most refreshing cordials (cordials there sucks, except for Coola by Coatee's, i think). No more terawikhing alone.

but balik2 ni mcm less quality pulak my puasa.
missed 2 terawikh already
just merely on first juzuk of The Quran..
the comfort of being at home, mcm byk je distractions, astro, studies, letih keje..
ish ish ish

it feels as though i've been gone for ages dah..

took wed n thurs off last week, so had a blasting long weekend.
before i forget happy deepavali n selamat berpuasa to all.
and of course, happy bday to me, and all october babies out there.
thx for all the well wished from everyone.. and yeah, got to admit, i'm such a bitch the other day

and he was such an angel.. here comes the full report..eheh

21 oct 2003
so he did turn up at our family dinner AND managed to settle that matters of his.
papa made a little opening speech, the typical picture of killing time after ordering our dinner, with a cigar in his hand.. he went.. we are gathered today ANAK-ANAK because blablabla...
again n again he mention the word our family, our family, anak beranak.. well, u know wat i mean, and that made me go red and all warm inside. in fact dearest was also blushing (to those who knows him, yes, it's POSSIBLE). Dinner was so, so great. Never tasted anything as authentic at that price before. It's a vietnamese n nyonya fusion seafood restaurant in kelana jaya, somewhere near FAM n the dewan serbaguna, i'm recommendingla ni, if u want details, mail me. we had big fat prawns, fish, squid, chicken, 2 types of mushroom dish, crab and we had to order twice cos tak cukup2.. best giler!! abe n zetty pun dah comfy around jazmi. he'll be abe's officemate soon anyway. zetty has finally gotten over his physical factors and thinks he's cool now, kurang asam punya budak.

22 oct 2003

i cant remember but i think it was at 12am sharp on 22 oct, he called and sang happy birthday to me. and i just laugh before continue snoring. jahat gila. but it's my day, and it's only the beginning.

i'm beginning to think that an entry on my bday celebration is a bit too much.
but it's worthy of documentation and if u hate it.. BUZZ OFFF!!

he made a surprise visit, took emergency leave (?!!) to lepak2 with me. segan jugak kat mama but since he seems ok about it, and mama pun mcm cool je, continue with her usual busy routine, so we lepak jelah. he layan zetty tgk cinta 3 musim for the zillionth time while i study by his side. bday girl pun kena study jugak cos she's just received confirmation of her exam application and not even 50% through the syllabus.

12.30 pm, i received a bouquet of yellow roses. siap ada special message from the delivery boy lagi. i'm just so in love, not the flowers la, but the sender. and i'm begining to think that i will never be receiving any of those conventional intense red roses anymorelah, cos i told him i like yellow.. ahhaha.. but i love them all the same.

had lunch with him, had coffee with him while .. i'm going to declare this to the world.. figuring out nama anak2.. ahahaha.. more like making fun of the results of both our names combined. u know, the usual thing high school couples do, but really hold on to. no way, not in this caselah.. and we havent settled on any names yet.

dinner with him again.. ahahaha.. my parents kasi chance je.. whole day ok.. my mom siap puji2 lagi the make up and everything, tolong pilihkan kasut.. mcm nak gi date mende je.. ehehe.. she made me nervous about it..
we went to jake's charbroil, damansara, and it was superb!! i had their nototious spare rib and i'm going to do the words of mouth marketing for them la.. it's out of this world. and it's not because i'm immensely in love with the guy sitting in front of me during dinner that nite.. but it was gila best. it's juicy, heavenly tender, and sweet. i had trouble finishing it sbb sayang sgt the meat... ahahaha. i learnt something new that nite, he likes his steak medium too.. aahhh... i just love our common interest in food.. ehehe

the desert was a guess watch which i've been eyeing for, kononnya to get with my first gaji. now i have my OWN watch!!!! and it's the one i like, from the one i like.. cool!

i belanja him mcdonald sundae before heading home.

23 oct 2003

dearest demam, took mc, came over. ehehe..
we layan all the movies available on astro
cooked him nasi bubur, his style

25 oct 2003
came over straight after office. lepak2 borak2 with mama n papa. papa suruh dia buat some DIY for the hse. mcm dah permanent resident pulak. then went for movie, Freaky Friday dgn cho and him. belanja both of them cos i felt like it. bought 2 large pop corn set and both finish theirs in a blink. kureng betul. noticed my fav chicken in town has landed in sunway pyramid. so we had a feast again. they had fun teaming up to kutuk me, apart from talking football and play station.

26 oct 2003
came first thing in the morning. went to get out DIY stuff with him n cho. lepak at my fav nasi lemak place. ali berkat jaya. highly recommended thought the chicken portion has been obviously halved. but since 2 halves was more like 4 dulu, it was ok. then went back and berprojek. install the new line for the new telekom phone for streamyx n talian cinta. ahahaha.. so cho was more than rajin to help aroundla.
2 long-time-no-see fren and a more-than-always-see fren came over and we had another domestic feast and karoke session. he was more occupied in the new play station games with cho n abe.
God this sounds like one happy family.
frens left only after a full hot goss session(instead of terawikh ni), before and after high school photo comparison, make up try out and a pizza and 2 murtabaks.
i'm full and happy

and definitely on cloud 9.
even sms papa, mama, win to say i love him.
yes i did. told u i'm in love.

ok, situation

tomorrow's gf bday
bf has been preparing for it since weeks
since it's their first time celebrating it together
last week bf bought something for gf's bday, out of anxiousness bf told her he got something special for her, and warned her, it's a bit pricey but she's not to mention anything about it, cos he doesnt care.
yesterday, bf went to get the wrapping paper, and wasnt able to spend much time on the phone with gf as usual, as he said, the wrapping process takes a little bit extra time since it's special.

today bf received a good news, bf secured a new job, with a huge salary jump.
both were ecstatic and had lunch together, for the first time ever, like other working couples, stealing time in between their professional demands.
gf is happy, she cant quit smiling
plus gf got herself 2 days leave
and bf told gf not to go anywhere tomorrow, just in case, if someone were to see her..
the not-so-blur gf knows, she's in for a surprise during the day tomorrow(which is not a much of a surprise afterall, but who cares, she loves surprises, so she'll still call it a surprise)
gf is still smiling

untill just now
gf's dad call, to bring fwd their family dinner to tonight since he has too many golf functions to attend later this week.
gf's dad asked gf to invite bf
for the bday, and to commemorate his new job
gf dunno wat's better than smiling.. laugh? it would be insane, cos it's not funny
but gf was happier than just 'cant quit smiling'

then
gf calls bf
bf cant make it
cos bf need to go somewhere to get something for the gf
and it has to be tonight cos bf's fren who's going to help bf with that something is only available tonight, that is after much persuasion from the bf
gf prefer bf to go for the dinner instead
this dinner would be super special
for gf's bday, for bf's new job, bf's first experience with gf's family's favourite delicacy-CRAB!
a gift is enough, afterall gf never received any bday gift/anything from a guy she can refer to as bf before
oh i forgot the part about the reservation at the best steakhouse in town tomorrow nite
so there, a 'pricey' gift, carefully wrapped and a dinner for two
is this getting too much
no bf has to go get this special thing with this fren of his
and skip the family dinner
bf wants to skip family dinner
gf is tak puas hati
gf wants bf to be present
bf insist to get this special thing
gf ask bf to postpone the special thing to another occasion, afterall gf just got bf ONE present for bf's bday and a dinner at their most convenient place, nothing special about it, at least not comparable to this ala Mission Impossible plan the bf has set
bf tak nak, the plan is like this and he will execute accordingly
gf starts to get mixed feelings
mad, upset, frustrated, anxious, pleased, sad, impressed, irritated..
gf feels childish, it's not that bf's going away to cuddle away with other girls, or have dinner with his best female fren, or even, an innocent football game with his buddies
he's gonna get her something
and she's sulking cos she cant have it all

now tell me,
am i a bitch??

on the way to work, erafm

"cantik baru cinta, atau cinta baru cantik"

pretty weird topic, almost redundant at first, until i listened to wat the callers have to say. one guy called up and opt for cinta baru cantik. "kalau kita dah cinta, lepas tu baru nampak dia cantik, maknanya kita bertuah sebab kita special, boleh nampak 'kecantikan' dia, biarpun org tak kata dia cantik. katakan dia hitam, tapi kalau kita tgk dia nampak berseri2 je, untunglah kita. org lain tak nampak tu. lagipun, kalau kita dah suka dia, dan kita dah nampak dia cantik lepas tu, walaupun org tak cakap mcm tu, takdelah berebut. lagi bahagia."

hey, i have to agree with thatlah. u think it's impossible to like/love one without looks? think again, it's the most rewarding feeling i think, discovering the little2 things hidden under the 'uglies'. noticing his delicate long n curly lashes, his cutesy little fingernails, his fat thick ears..err, i'll shall stop here. but u get wat i mean. it's the discovery that gives me the high.

afterall, i'm one of those under the category of to be cinta-ed first before the person can notice my dark brown eyes. ahahhaha...

how i envy his lashes!
jumpinf off the cloud nine.. off to work.. sorry for the jiwangness.

i got a sneak preview of my bday present from him.
it's NOT gonna be a thumbdrive.
darn!

the only useful thing i could thing of for my bday present..since the rest lies between the continum of amber locket to maybe amethyst locket.. hehe

why not a thumbdrive, cos according to dearest he wouldnt want me to start sucking all those multigigabyte files from work to bring home, hence no time for him.. hehe.. how d'hell did he figure this out?? a pat on his back. he did figure it out correctly. i was thinking of it, like, yesterday.

he's sneaking out with frens tonite, to get me that mistery 'green' thing. yes, the only thing i know about this yr's huha is it's green. oh well, we'll see.. i havent been getting much bday present since i cant remember, but thx to the brissie tradition of making a huge fuss celebrating each and every bday, i got quite a few of unexpected things which includes my neverbeenwashed bedmate - TITI. i'll put a picture of it laterlater. it has the most endearing butt smell.

taking couple of days off next week cos i'm seriously far left behind in my course. dearest dah sibuk2 warning. even refuse to have lenghty chats on the phone. ish, tensionnya. skema la bf aku ni. takpe, nasib baik jugak ada dia. nasib sgt baik. :)

geramnya, why do they have to dump all the stuff on me,
geramnya, geramnya,
boss from other dept pun dah start pandai2 suruh staff refer to me for info regarding my dept..
and i've a major presentation next monday
geramnya geramnya... i know bunyi mengada but i'm just so -- pissed off.
i just wanna be home, the newly rearranged family lounge would erase all this irritation.
and channel 11 astro.. i wanna go holiday somewhere!!..

i dont mean to publicize anything here but i feel the need to jot it down.
an ol fren of mine just called, and at the first 'hello' i know she wasnt ok.. and yes, she cried, and cried.. over a problem that she has been trying to deny. (i was having hard time playing aunt agony, cos 1. it's been soooo long since i played 'mommy' for the society 2.i was in my ultra quiet office, i think they can even hear her cry on the other end)

say, u got 2 guys, who likes u a lot, whom you like. one who's so perfect, financially, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually etc and oh Lord, he's ur bf. and one with flaws here n there, n maybe there n there, suffers complex like most ppl do, an occasional MCP, basically, just human enough yet seems to have the superficial power of understanding u before u can even open ur mouth.. ie, your soulmate or more accurately known as mr x-bf. who would it be?

it's devastating when u're in the muddle of your problems and talking to dear one does not alleviate any of those burden, but you KNOW mr soulmate has his arms open, and they have can automatically turn into your most comfy cry spot, the emotional panadol. Is it not wrong for you to turn to mr soulmate? it's sad when the first person u think of when u wake up everyday is that 'occasional MCP' rather than mr perfect. wat would u do?
seriously, i pun dunnolah. if i were her, i wont decide now, even tho mr MCP (see how mr soulmate turns into mr MCP progressively) gave his kata dua.

for me relationship is a process. having gone through a dynamic one (haha!) i think i've learnt a lot about it in the past couple of yrs, enough to understand that things take time, but it sure pays. i feel like telling her to stop clinging to that guy, (i dunno where i grew this resentment towards this guy i never met, maternal instinct maybe) and start opening up to the other guy. so mr perfect is not perfect afterall. maybe he doesnt know how to give comfort. so dear fren, show him how to. maybe that's the trick of the game. afterall i dont believe in the typical girls attitude of expecting the other half to read their minds. it'll steal the fun and induce gaduh je. been there. ehehe. even in a physical thing like sex pun u have to tell and show how, and we're talking about something as ambigious as feelings here.

i dont believe thing will work out like magic here. i know it sounds so unromantic. but no one will understand u overnite. even yourself. kan?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUUU..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YING.BLOGSPOT.COMMM...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUUUU.....

HIPHIP..HURRAAAYY!!

brand new layout, brand new commenting host, brand new ying.blogspot.com who turns 1 today
and for the first time ever, narcissism has gone a step further.. yes up there, that's ying.

boss said i handle too many tasks, from preparing tender/price quote/order documents, to marketing plan, business plan, setting up billing database and liasing with customers AND suppliers. he made me tired listening to the list.
i dunno if it's a good thing or otherwise.
maybe he thinks i am capable (here's the word again) of multitasking
or i simply cant say 'No'
fact is all those tasks are listed in my Job description sheet, and it seems logic since i have 2 bosses to report to.
sapa yg screwed up now, me or the system?

on another note, mr boss is very happy with the presentation, said mine was the best in the group. even beat the one prepared by the grp's very own IT sub? hehe, tu my aim. In fact Mrs CFO is quite impressed too.

ms boss is away, left me a chunk of stuff to settle, which are settled, since both mr n ms are not around to bug.

enuff about work and angkat bakul, this is scary. (got it from ash)

this is totally waaayy out, and wat happened is waaay out too..
i am utterly SAD
i feel a wave of change is heading this way
nuffsaid.

this is a little self indulgence
entry meant for my own leisure read, 5 yrd down the line >> PLS IGNORE

i always like wat they say about october babies

OCTOBER: --> Loves to chat. --> Loves those who loves them.--> Loves to takes things at the center. --> Attractive and suave.--> Inner and physical beauty. --> Does not lie or pretend. --> Sympathetic.--> Treats friends importantly.--> Always making friends. --> Easily hurt but recovers easily. --> Daydreamer. --> Opinionated.--> Does not care of what others think. --> Emotional. --> Decisive. --> Strong clairvoyance.--> Loves to travel, the arts and literature.--> Soft-spoken,loving and caring Romantic !!! --> Touchy and easily jealous. --> Concerned. Loves outdoors. --> Just and fair.--> Spendthrift.--> Easily influenced.--> Easily loses confidence.--> Loves children.

pelikla, how do they manage to figure me out sooo precisely..??

got this from a fren, wanna know wat they brag about u, ask for the email lah, not the kind to automatically fwd emails sgt, malas

i should not start with the fact that work is abundance and i'm too busy

i went to watch cinta kolestrol last saturday, courtesy of hetz, thx mate!
bravo to me. another effort to support the malaysian film industry.

it's not bad, but sometimes i just dont understand why they cant use 'bahasa pasar' throughout a conversation. the weird thing is they allow english words in some sentence, the darling sana, darling sini, i miss u, i love u. call me yaaa?? but when it's a serious scene, they just have to induce humour in it by sentences like..ermm.."kau tak kenal siapa aku sebenarnya" or "aku berjanji, aku takkan sia-siakan kau, PERCAYALAH"...
oh yeah, may i add, this is from hetz, where on earth do u find lovers using kau-aku
shed some light on this pls.
of course, this observation is not limited to cinta kolestrol, in fact, the story did well with usage kita/saya-awak, which i dont use, but i know many do.
and, just a note, fat ppl do not necessarily eat dgn gelojohnya (see wat malay movie does to me), like potrayed in the first part of the movie, and, oh, i dont believe obeses turn to a bowl of fresh fruits for comfort. bring on the ice creamlah!

then on sunday, i watched cinta tiga musim cds, musim kedua, and part of musim ketiga.
where do i get all these stuff?? ehehe.. thx to a very malay brother of mine. and they're originals ok.
i must say i like this drama. it's beyond my expectation, n the fact that i am quite anxious to change cds after cds even when i'm not a fond fan of Aqashah or Amy mastura, must have earned this series some creditlah, at least from me.
The storyline is oh-so-jiwang yet it's realisticla i must say. I like all the fight/conflict scenes, cos they're just the was how they happen in real life, well, from experience and wat i heard here n there.
but there are scenes when i feel like hiding under the pillow cos the 'stare in the eyes' or 'the butterfly in the stomach'
is too long, far too long..
aku yg malu when aqashah stared at amy with the widest fake smile!!
coming from a person who never finish Titanic the movie, and still doesnt find a good reason to.

no-no, not turning into a movie critic or some sort. or those ppl who'll go all out finding faults in malay movies (not that it's so hard).. i watched it, in cinema, and i'm returning for more, maybe, so wat more can u ask?

mamapapa balik from perth tonite. i noticed i've been blogging about my work too muchla, i lost touch with the after-office-hour-me. and updates on jazmi finishing his exam, me buying baju raya material that matches his, the $1300 i spent on my beloved Waja (dont ask!), and my retail therapy with hetz which produces the very first make-up set, finally, which cost below $100.. complete with liquid eye liner k??

ahaha
got to go..

i know i'm mad.
i dont even know how this works, but it sure looks fun
and affordable... found a cheaper deal at amazon.com
how come nobody told me this kinda coolness exist

I AM GOING TO BUY IT.
i'm having millions of ideas wat to do with it..nevermind the film developing cost.

on another positive note
dearest received an increment, and his bonus has been announced.
dont know how much yet
but it is surely rezeki, which we didnt anticipate, notice the word 'we'..
eheheh... someone's definitely gonna get a bday present soooonn...

: )

i'm happy,
still , keje byk gila..

boss just came back, the whole buss plan has been thrown out.
meeting which was suppose to last 2 days, ends up even before morning tea break.
to revise the whole thing
deadline : tomorrow noon
boss has alerted us to prepare for sleepless nite tonite.

and i'm suppose to meet him tonite after 5 days of him being away.
either tonite or next week

i'd love to see him tonite

i'm just worn out by the news.

letihletihletih
ineedtogoback
butmyfeettootiredtodrivehome

boleh ke mcm tu
still kat office
keje mcm sial..finaly habis, or i want to believe so, at least for today
nak balik, too tired to go now

takpe, boss sendiri cakap esok rileks sikit, sbb dia takde, he wont bug me
yeah right

this is so not funny..