back
finally back
my throat still sore, and still plaghmy (spelling?)..of course u need not know the detail but that doesnt mean u wont know. work is pleasantly minimal today, after the wave of buss plan has subside, i never thought i'd see the shore again but here i am merrily swinging my swivel chair left and right.
dearest is away. having exams for these 2 weeks. translated into behave-n-dont-disturb-him season for me. which is oh-so-hard! mengadanya aku! so while he's away, i tried to occupy myself with my own CIMA study guide. which works well. i'm almost half way through the course, who would have thought. everytime i finished a chapter, i cant stop feeling good inside. this is working for me, i can actually study on my own. i actualy have, hey, discipline. eheheh.. nevermind the outcome of the exam. ehehe.. ada baiknya ada bf tgh study lagi ni, if u cant beat them, join them. seems perfect here.
actually i'm racing to cover most of the topics before the week after next, cos that's where his holidays start, n it sucks to be the one who have to turn down dates n turn to the books.
hey, this remind me so much of uni years. the charting of study plan, n finding little thrills in scoring the goals. n the high u get when u know u're 2 topics behind time, but u're catching up no matter wat. i know, i'm like that. i'm not those kiasu ppl who banks loads n loads of past yrs papers n start discussing the exam questions the minute they step out the hall, or even those who compares exam marks religeously. but i have my own madness.
so much for uni yrs, i spend most of my weekend tutoring the clueless bro of mine addmaths. yup. i never thought i could/would. but i did. n i still remember most of it. confident enough to teach is confident enoughla tu. waa! surprise me again! but yeah, maths is my favorite anyway. that's y i was more enthusiastic as a tutor than cho as the student. but he has no complains. he better not, since we all know n 'dont like' the pitch mama used when teaching zetty sifir, or papa's 'laaa...ni pun tak tau???' more often than 'this is how..'. he said maybe i should start a tution soon. perhaps for his frens, i dont mind. i dont demand. 50% of wat they have to pay the cikgu2 bertauliah is fine. hmm.. wattabout it? me, the add mths tutor. mr tan will be rolling on the floor laughing out loud. good, he can join mr lim when he finds out i'm doing CIMA, after a succesfull completion of an acc degree.
God, i'm full of surprises.
and i'm full of good vibes today.
Monday never felt like this. hehe.
maybe i'm better off as a student, than some exec who spends 8hrs a day in front of the PC
Friday, September 26, 2003
i'm sick, sick, sick
too many work last week, too many to even steal a minute or two to update
and now i'm sick
been down with mc for 2 days, and going to take half day today
anyway.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR!
glad u enjoyed the dinner. (u better say u did-u took half of mine)
celebrate2 punya pasal (sempat lagi tu), running nose n sore throat got worse and no sign of getting better. padan muka.
but it was worth it.
really2 worth it.
:)
snorttt...
too many work last week, too many to even steal a minute or two to update
and now i'm sick
been down with mc for 2 days, and going to take half day today
anyway.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR!
glad u enjoyed the dinner. (u better say u did-u took half of mine)
celebrate2 punya pasal (sempat lagi tu), running nose n sore throat got worse and no sign of getting better. padan muka.
but it was worth it.
really2 worth it.
:)
snorttt...
Tuesday, September 16, 2003
now i dont really mind knowing that the yellow rose came from that cekik darah shop, cos it is somehow, very quality flower. day 2, it is still blooming, and the 'neck' of the stem is still as hard. i cant belive i'm keeping a daily account of that flower. teringat 'how to loose a guy in 10 days' and their 'love plant'.. i cant be that yucky!
work banyak2 gila.. i feel like some huge object has come tumbling down on me.. in fact collapsing into little pieces, for me to pick up and clear. halfway through, not even lunchtime, i feel tired already. help me lah God. the office is extremely busy today, i arrived at the office 1/2 hour earlier and voila! almost all is here and faxes are coming in and going out, photocopier is on trillion copies mode, phones are ringing ok! before i could warm the seat, the boss dah panggil, figures are in, gobble them up, digest!
phone buat hal lagi, on the way to the service centre, ok..tiba2 je..siot betul, dahla yesterday, when it happens, or more like when it's not functioning, i received lots of calls, from old frens, ok not lots, but at least 2.. and these 2 susah sgt nak call or return call. geram betul. nak trade in, not that cheap to get a new one. and bila pikir balik, it happens kadang2.. but i paid bloody rm420 for it, takkan i cant expect at least a phone that emit sound on the other end when i talk. lainla if the color screen suddenly go black n white ke.. but this is a phone, when ppl call i expect to hear them and vice versa. it's not the case here.
bila nak kawin laki kaya, duduk rumah goyang kaki, main game on my mobile phone, that works.
papa suruh buang the phone, get a new one. with wat? air liur?
rileks2.. pms dah habis pun still like this, 2, 3 minggu nanti another round of it, then takleh nak blame sapa2 dah, cos it's just PMS...
yesterday managed to finish a chapter, gila, it's totally new thinglah. thought it's just extension of wat i've learned. i'm playing with fire here. managed to cover a chapter of add maths with cho as well. God, he's clueless. and worse, he's just like me. one who should put double or triple effort to fully comprehend a subject, unlike others whose brains work concurrently with the teachers writing on the blackboard.
i'm off to work!
work banyak2 gila.. i feel like some huge object has come tumbling down on me.. in fact collapsing into little pieces, for me to pick up and clear. halfway through, not even lunchtime, i feel tired already. help me lah God. the office is extremely busy today, i arrived at the office 1/2 hour earlier and voila! almost all is here and faxes are coming in and going out, photocopier is on trillion copies mode, phones are ringing ok! before i could warm the seat, the boss dah panggil, figures are in, gobble them up, digest!
phone buat hal lagi, on the way to the service centre, ok..tiba2 je..siot betul, dahla yesterday, when it happens, or more like when it's not functioning, i received lots of calls, from old frens, ok not lots, but at least 2.. and these 2 susah sgt nak call or return call. geram betul. nak trade in, not that cheap to get a new one. and bila pikir balik, it happens kadang2.. but i paid bloody rm420 for it, takkan i cant expect at least a phone that emit sound on the other end when i talk. lainla if the color screen suddenly go black n white ke.. but this is a phone, when ppl call i expect to hear them and vice versa. it's not the case here.
bila nak kawin laki kaya, duduk rumah goyang kaki, main game on my mobile phone, that works.
papa suruh buang the phone, get a new one. with wat? air liur?
rileks2.. pms dah habis pun still like this, 2, 3 minggu nanti another round of it, then takleh nak blame sapa2 dah, cos it's just PMS...
yesterday managed to finish a chapter, gila, it's totally new thinglah. thought it's just extension of wat i've learned. i'm playing with fire here. managed to cover a chapter of add maths with cho as well. God, he's clueless. and worse, he's just like me. one who should put double or triple effort to fully comprehend a subject, unlike others whose brains work concurrently with the teachers writing on the blackboard.
i'm off to work!
Monday, September 15, 2003
perfect sunday, lepak reading free mag (courtesy of an unlucky absentminded person) and free coffees n muffin @ coffee bean. enormous 1901 dog. yellow rose.
and someone has to spoil my Monday, not that it's not already spoilt just by being itself. Geramnya dekat the despatch. ok, i know i'm probably half his age, but that doesnt mean i dont need to be respected. it's his job to pick up n delivery stuff, y does he made me feel like i'm asking favor from him. and especially when i was being nice, with the 'mintak tolong pls encik blablabla'. looking around, i might be one of those few courteous young exec around, and yes, when i say courteous, it's not just to the boss. sial la.. haa... (habis puasa aku) the fact that he knows i'm new, that shows i am not familiar with the procedure, and it's not like i assume things and deal with things my own way. senang je, boleh amik ni tak? ooo, tak boleh, tak cover that area, the other person cuti.
y must he go ha, nak apa? awak ni sapa? kenapa shah alam saya kena ambik? oo..saya keluar despatch, esok baru balik, byk round (smirk)....nak urgent ambik sendiri, bukannya jauh.. tolongla wei, it's your job. and mind u, i wasnt being bossy. siap bagi salam n all when i see him. ni yg rasa nak kerek je dgn non-exec ni. sometimes when kita baik, mulala... mentang2 i'm young. plsla.. geram betul.. like i cant function without him..
huh!!..yellow rose, yellow rose, yellow rose
and someone has to spoil my Monday, not that it's not already spoilt just by being itself. Geramnya dekat the despatch. ok, i know i'm probably half his age, but that doesnt mean i dont need to be respected. it's his job to pick up n delivery stuff, y does he made me feel like i'm asking favor from him. and especially when i was being nice, with the 'mintak tolong pls encik blablabla'. looking around, i might be one of those few courteous young exec around, and yes, when i say courteous, it's not just to the boss. sial la.. haa... (habis puasa aku) the fact that he knows i'm new, that shows i am not familiar with the procedure, and it's not like i assume things and deal with things my own way. senang je, boleh amik ni tak? ooo, tak boleh, tak cover that area, the other person cuti.
y must he go ha, nak apa? awak ni sapa? kenapa shah alam saya kena ambik? oo..saya keluar despatch, esok baru balik, byk round (smirk)....nak urgent ambik sendiri, bukannya jauh.. tolongla wei, it's your job. and mind u, i wasnt being bossy. siap bagi salam n all when i see him. ni yg rasa nak kerek je dgn non-exec ni. sometimes when kita baik, mulala... mentang2 i'm young. plsla.. geram betul.. like i cant function without him..
huh!!..yellow rose, yellow rose, yellow rose
inhale, exhale..
welcome another week..
Friday, September 12, 2003
Thursday, September 11, 2003
dear blog
office hours over
online with papa
the new project
new for him, probably something new for jazmi too : )
after a week of helping him polish his resume, n sending some to various companies
now this
God has answered my prayer again, this time, as timely as i wish it could be.
eager. am nervous at the same time.
office hours over
online with papa
the new project
new for him, probably something new for jazmi too : )
after a week of helping him polish his resume, n sending some to various companies
now this
God has answered my prayer again, this time, as timely as i wish it could be.
eager. am nervous at the same time.
i listened to era.fm on my way to office today.
their morning chat topic of the day was 'isteri berubah selepas berkahwin, or maybe suami isteri' i dont quite know , cos i only managed to listen to one caller before shifting to another station
he got on my nerves.
this guy was complaining about his wife, how she balloned after the 1st child and was being ignorant about her body image with the arrival of the kid.
"saya dah suruh kurus, dia buat tak tau je, hari2 jaga anak, jaga anak je.."
"isteri kena la jaga badan, kalau masa kawin mcm tu, lepas kawin pun mcm tu la"
the Dj went on suggesting that the wife should go for exercises n gym.
"apa kata dia pegi gym hari2 kan, hari2 dok kat gym" at this point i think the DJ was being sarcastic.
and the man goes "ha, sepatutnya mcm tu la"
God!
jauhkanla aku dari manusia2 mcm ni.
though i agree with the fact that man n woman should at least try to look their best, n most importantly be healthy for each other, n for the relationship, even if (or especially) the relationship spells marriage, i think it would be a shame to have your husband complaining about ur lack of effort in self management, esp due to attending HIS own kids, on air.
wateva happened to for better or for worse?
their morning chat topic of the day was 'isteri berubah selepas berkahwin, or maybe suami isteri' i dont quite know , cos i only managed to listen to one caller before shifting to another station
he got on my nerves.
this guy was complaining about his wife, how she balloned after the 1st child and was being ignorant about her body image with the arrival of the kid.
"saya dah suruh kurus, dia buat tak tau je, hari2 jaga anak, jaga anak je.."
"isteri kena la jaga badan, kalau masa kawin mcm tu, lepas kawin pun mcm tu la"
the Dj went on suggesting that the wife should go for exercises n gym.
"apa kata dia pegi gym hari2 kan, hari2 dok kat gym" at this point i think the DJ was being sarcastic.
and the man goes "ha, sepatutnya mcm tu la"
God!
jauhkanla aku dari manusia2 mcm ni.
though i agree with the fact that man n woman should at least try to look their best, n most importantly be healthy for each other, n for the relationship, even if (or especially) the relationship spells marriage, i think it would be a shame to have your husband complaining about ur lack of effort in self management, esp due to attending HIS own kids, on air.
wateva happened to for better or for worse?
Wednesday, September 10, 2003
it's 5 past 6, i'm suppose to pick up my cousin, zetty's playmate on the way back home. promised my uncle i'll be there at 6.30, but think i really should put this down.
been reading my entries in oct last yr. (i like myself too much u see)
noticed one thing
all the thing i prayed for, i wished for then, ARE already granted.
on my 22nd bday, i made a wish for 3 things
a degree
back home safe
him by my side
and here i am still complaining.
in fact, somewhere along the way, i did wish to loose some weight, and though i gained all (and some extra) back, i did lost 10 kg in total
Ya Allah, please forgive me. forgive my ignorance. forgive the unthankful me.
I am deeply grateful for wat i have now, for where i am and for wat i am. Thank you Lord.
Thank you.
Amin
been reading my entries in oct last yr. (i like myself too much u see)
noticed one thing
all the thing i prayed for, i wished for then, ARE already granted.
on my 22nd bday, i made a wish for 3 things
a degree
back home safe
him by my side
and here i am still complaining.
in fact, somewhere along the way, i did wish to loose some weight, and though i gained all (and some extra) back, i did lost 10 kg in total
Ya Allah, please forgive me. forgive my ignorance. forgive the unthankful me.
I am deeply grateful for wat i have now, for where i am and for wat i am. Thank you Lord.
Thank you.
Amin
i'm so glad i stumbled into a few blogs i havent been to, or heard of today. it's soo refreshing to know that there are other small-scale blog owners like me around. those who talks nothing but of themselves. perfect. a perfect source of knowloedge. wat am i talking about?? alah, simple, i am more interested in ppl's life than in research findings, debates, the meaning of that and this, the implication of that n this. shallow? ok, if u think i am. but i learn better that way. i just dont have that sort of attention span it takes to read a long winded blog entry/comments on some profound grey stuff.
i have a project coming up. it's nothing big, but i think it'll be useful (for me, ONLY) and i'm looking fwd to this.
i was reading this person's account on one of his chatting experience. it clicked the 'refresh' button on some of my memories on chatting. maybe it was the main reason why i'm here. if i didnt chat, i wouldnt have become such a net addict like i'm now, amounting to my own blog. well anyway, chatting has taught me a lot of things, good lessons, through bad n good ways.
i discovered everything i wanna know about real-life sex n its happenings in msia thru frens on the net. enough to prepare me for the adegan sex bawah tangga by edisi siasat. and to avoid my jaw dropping to the floor hearing news about this n that girl in highschool/college losing virginity to this and that guy and the WHEREs and WHENs. though i was really active in the chatroom during late 90's when the prono vcd of this n that is not the most heated discussion at the mamaks, it has opened my eyes. i was de-naive via the net. from 'whooaa...serious?' to 'ic'. in fact i'm not surprised if some of my frens would think i'm not a virgin, simply because my knowledge in this sort of thing, down to the minute detail is vast. my vocab of these 'vulgar' as some might refer can also be broad considering i dont swear (well, not that much) .i read. i watch. and i chat.
well, among others, that was the highlight of the chatting experience.
and of course, there is this guy who insist on using 'abg' though he is only a yr older, one who has never give up on my kemalasan reply email or phonecalls, in fact still continously call me, to congratulate me on my spm, scholarship, bf, degree..
the never met ghost fren of mine for 6 yrs, shares overlapping circle of frens, sorrows n joy
my dear fren who dont need any more mention in this blog cos there'll be too much
and mister j.
: )
i'm glad i WAS online.
i have a project coming up. it's nothing big, but i think it'll be useful (for me, ONLY) and i'm looking fwd to this.
i was reading this person's account on one of his chatting experience. it clicked the 'refresh' button on some of my memories on chatting. maybe it was the main reason why i'm here. if i didnt chat, i wouldnt have become such a net addict like i'm now, amounting to my own blog. well anyway, chatting has taught me a lot of things, good lessons, through bad n good ways.
i discovered everything i wanna know about real-life sex n its happenings in msia thru frens on the net. enough to prepare me for the adegan sex bawah tangga by edisi siasat. and to avoid my jaw dropping to the floor hearing news about this n that girl in highschool/college losing virginity to this and that guy and the WHEREs and WHENs. though i was really active in the chatroom during late 90's when the prono vcd of this n that is not the most heated discussion at the mamaks, it has opened my eyes. i was de-naive via the net. from 'whooaa...serious?' to 'ic'. in fact i'm not surprised if some of my frens would think i'm not a virgin, simply because my knowledge in this sort of thing, down to the minute detail is vast. my vocab of these 'vulgar' as some might refer can also be broad considering i dont swear (well, not that much) .i read. i watch. and i chat.
well, among others, that was the highlight of the chatting experience.
and of course, there is this guy who insist on using 'abg' though he is only a yr older, one who has never give up on my kemalasan reply email or phonecalls, in fact still continously call me, to congratulate me on my spm, scholarship, bf, degree..
the never met ghost fren of mine for 6 yrs, shares overlapping circle of frens, sorrows n joy
my dear fren who dont need any more mention in this blog cos there'll be too much
and mister j.
: )
i'm glad i WAS online.
Tuesday, September 09, 2003
hey, got the archives sorted out, so nothing went missing anymore.. just one thing.. the pictures. i'll put them up, i promise, now i know how, remebered adi was telling something about converting the files. i'm getting comfy with my html. oklah, mainly cos we're endowed with
blogskins
studies my first chapter for the exam last nite. accompanied by cho n his selection of slow songs. God, his slow songs are (pathetic) SLOW songs. but yeah, it did the work, and i was singing along, and studying. reminded me of uni days, but i have company here. true, i prefer studying alone though. my own pace. making my own noise, screwing up lyrics. to think of it, i never had any study group. but i do have partners. and through all these yrs, i always wonder y, even my study partner, has to be a guy. i guess i'm just more disciplined that way.
the hols are here. the traffice is clear. (it rhymes!)
and the sight of my bro n sis sleeping, or watching tv, or enjoying exagerated breakfast, is really annoying. but thank God, at least the traffic's clear. and i can leave home 1/2 hour earlier. dont have to send zetty to school, no more morning tension. (she doesnt know how to tell the time, so when she's done n i'm not, i'm considered late, nevermind the time..and of course, she's the princess..or in fact, the Queen)
on another note, i was thinking of spending some $$$ on vanity this month. just bought a $50 shampoo, that's suppose to add volume to my hair, going for whole range of those skincare products, toner, moisturizer n wat not. (was belek2ing my face the other day, and God, it's AGING, and it shows). i'm hoping to also get myself the my first ever make up set. yes, not the AUD$2 red earth( (esprit in msia) lipstick, or the Johnson n johnson compact powder (i'm just waiting for the time till zetty gets one herself), or the buy 1 free 1 item my fren n i split among us. i want my own set. not just any set, the set that suits me after thorough consultation. hehe, i'm crazy. this is not wants for a 23 yr old. it must have been need for most of my peers ages ago. darn! just yesterday, my colleague told me i look pale. when i wasnt sick. so i guess what she meant was, go put urself some color. and since my job involves meeting ppl jugak, to a certain degree, well, apart from updating my blogs n those data entry rituals, heh!, i guess i should 'age up' n join in. afterall, all of them here do make up, and some overdid. and since i'm earning now, sitting on it waiting for my parents to go crazy n offer to buy a set is pretty useless. but of course, my bday is not that far away. oh, i am soo kedekut.
blogskins
studies my first chapter for the exam last nite. accompanied by cho n his selection of slow songs. God, his slow songs are (pathetic) SLOW songs. but yeah, it did the work, and i was singing along, and studying. reminded me of uni days, but i have company here. true, i prefer studying alone though. my own pace. making my own noise, screwing up lyrics. to think of it, i never had any study group. but i do have partners. and through all these yrs, i always wonder y, even my study partner, has to be a guy. i guess i'm just more disciplined that way.
the hols are here. the traffice is clear. (it rhymes!)
and the sight of my bro n sis sleeping, or watching tv, or enjoying exagerated breakfast, is really annoying. but thank God, at least the traffic's clear. and i can leave home 1/2 hour earlier. dont have to send zetty to school, no more morning tension. (she doesnt know how to tell the time, so when she's done n i'm not, i'm considered late, nevermind the time..and of course, she's the princess..or in fact, the Queen)
on another note, i was thinking of spending some $$$ on vanity this month. just bought a $50 shampoo, that's suppose to add volume to my hair, going for whole range of those skincare products, toner, moisturizer n wat not. (was belek2ing my face the other day, and God, it's AGING, and it shows). i'm hoping to also get myself the my first ever make up set. yes, not the AUD$2 red earth( (esprit in msia) lipstick, or the Johnson n johnson compact powder (i'm just waiting for the time till zetty gets one herself), or the buy 1 free 1 item my fren n i split among us. i want my own set. not just any set, the set that suits me after thorough consultation. hehe, i'm crazy. this is not wants for a 23 yr old. it must have been need for most of my peers ages ago. darn! just yesterday, my colleague told me i look pale. when i wasnt sick. so i guess what she meant was, go put urself some color. and since my job involves meeting ppl jugak, to a certain degree, well, apart from updating my blogs n those data entry rituals, heh!, i guess i should 'age up' n join in. afterall, all of them here do make up, and some overdid. and since i'm earning now, sitting on it waiting for my parents to go crazy n offer to buy a set is pretty useless. but of course, my bday is not that far away. oh, i am soo kedekut.
Monday, September 08, 2003
was over here (office) for the weekend. finished all my parts though the buss plan is still in terrible shape. today i annouce leave for myself. very2 tired. but my fingers are still cool for a new template, so here goes..
mariahcarey-ish.. me n butterfly.. hah, since when, i just like the diff shades of green and of course, the butterfly, it's very detail, very authentic. at least i think so lah. uploaded nero at the office, so i can store lots of stuff here n burn it later. i've got some photos (like 500 of them) in my hard drive now, wish to share but dunno how. how aa??
dont feel like ranting much today. havent even visited most of my fav blogs.
i shall spend my next full hour on writing those years old letters, then settle some little2 stuff. there, i should be clear at least till they come up with the consolidated figures for the presentation. oo.boss said he likes my powerpoint n write up a lot, precise, meaningful, creative, very comfy on the eyes n . good choice in color coordination too. i should be an interior decorator la i tell u! speaking of which, i think the Casa Impian in ria is not that great afterall, 3 series n that's it, his styles repeat itself, bedroom ke, lounge ke, dining, they're all the same. the typical zen/balinese stiff set up. like how is an old granny suppose to sleep on a bed furnish with raw Thai silk runner. think fresh white crispy cotton, fluffy duvets and sea of pillows. i miss bed!
mariahcarey-ish.. me n butterfly.. hah, since when, i just like the diff shades of green and of course, the butterfly, it's very detail, very authentic. at least i think so lah. uploaded nero at the office, so i can store lots of stuff here n burn it later. i've got some photos (like 500 of them) in my hard drive now, wish to share but dunno how. how aa??
dont feel like ranting much today. havent even visited most of my fav blogs.
i shall spend my next full hour on writing those years old letters, then settle some little2 stuff. there, i should be clear at least till they come up with the consolidated figures for the presentation. oo.boss said he likes my powerpoint n write up a lot, precise, meaningful, creative, very comfy on the eyes n . good choice in color coordination too. i should be an interior decorator la i tell u! speaking of which, i think the Casa Impian in ria is not that great afterall, 3 series n that's it, his styles repeat itself, bedroom ke, lounge ke, dining, they're all the same. the typical zen/balinese stiff set up. like how is an old granny suppose to sleep on a bed furnish with raw Thai silk runner. think fresh white crispy cotton, fluffy duvets and sea of pillows. i miss bed!
Friday, September 05, 2003
i can almost always hear the little voice in me talk. i know it happens to all , pls say it does, but i believe mine is a bit too often and sometimes too loud. maybe i have a talkative 'little me' inside. i learnt a bit of psychology in my second yr and this thing is common, though a more severe case have a clinical name attached to it, and i firmly believe that mine never falls under this category. at least i dont feel haunted by it, or motivated just because of it.
this little voice of mine is more often than not redundant. as much as it can be annoying, it often go away in a blink of an eye, if i wish so. cos, let's face it, it's me.
i dunno where i'm heading with this, but today i feel like ranting. cos tomorrow, saturday, and sunday, which is the global weekly holiday, i am expected to be here to complete the damn business plan. so let me steal a bit of time here. cos they're gonna take away my whole weekend, not to mention the only weekend in this mth where jazmi's class is over by sunday noon. oh well.
(though some may find working on sat/sun a routine, i dont. and my body doesnt relax that way. as much as i dont own a happening life, i like it that way. so wat if i always spend time doing nothing during the weekend anyway, at least doing nothing shows some respect to my brain n body motor)
inhale.......exhale
ok, back to the little voice. i was driving to office this morning when i realize that the journey is getting shorter n shorter by day. start the engine, drop zetty at her sekolah agama, then suddenly, the office gate. thanks to the little voice.
the little voice likes to tell me stories. she reminds me of good n bad stuff. i have to admit, sometimes i let out a few 'errkk!' and "ishh!' when 'she' reminded me of embarassing moments. sometimes it never occur to me that it was embarassing, till 'she' point it out, smiling. just now over lunch, i think my social skill was down to negative. i realize i cant communicate when put with a tablefull of newly introduced male colleagues. and i thought, so wat. i'm just a typical shy, low profile girl. but 'she' kept bugging me to ask this, and that, and was making faces at me for being/acting like such a sissy. and yeah, i went emm..err.. a lot. and now, she's still bugging me. she's getting louder n louder by the day i tell u.
no, i'm not crazy. i'm just a proof that ally macbeal is not alone.
maybe she appears cos I say less these days. i think the amount i talk to everybody at the office or at home is in a week is the same amount as wat i used to chitchat with hetz n shaz back then, or shina n yea.. or anybody IN A DAY. the only person to lessen the gap is jazmi cos i talk to him 24/7 and yet, he is one competitive chatter to have, cos both of us can be a keen talker when together. (and i dont suppose that's a jiwang remark non/mal!) but one mere person.. this is not healthy.
so while the real me is on silent mode, in fact very2 silent as referred to as my colleagues (shaz n hetz will be laughing their ass off), the little me inside will do all the talking, like it or not, for only me to hear.
dont get me wrong though, i'm not lonely in my office. almost never.
afterall, a self-lover will never really despise a quiet chat with herself.
i hate to say this, though i mean it, have a GOOD weekend everyone!
this little voice of mine is more often than not redundant. as much as it can be annoying, it often go away in a blink of an eye, if i wish so. cos, let's face it, it's me.
i dunno where i'm heading with this, but today i feel like ranting. cos tomorrow, saturday, and sunday, which is the global weekly holiday, i am expected to be here to complete the damn business plan. so let me steal a bit of time here. cos they're gonna take away my whole weekend, not to mention the only weekend in this mth where jazmi's class is over by sunday noon. oh well.
(though some may find working on sat/sun a routine, i dont. and my body doesnt relax that way. as much as i dont own a happening life, i like it that way. so wat if i always spend time doing nothing during the weekend anyway, at least doing nothing shows some respect to my brain n body motor)
inhale.......exhale
ok, back to the little voice. i was driving to office this morning when i realize that the journey is getting shorter n shorter by day. start the engine, drop zetty at her sekolah agama, then suddenly, the office gate. thanks to the little voice.
the little voice likes to tell me stories. she reminds me of good n bad stuff. i have to admit, sometimes i let out a few 'errkk!' and "ishh!' when 'she' reminded me of embarassing moments. sometimes it never occur to me that it was embarassing, till 'she' point it out, smiling. just now over lunch, i think my social skill was down to negative. i realize i cant communicate when put with a tablefull of newly introduced male colleagues. and i thought, so wat. i'm just a typical shy, low profile girl. but 'she' kept bugging me to ask this, and that, and was making faces at me for being/acting like such a sissy. and yeah, i went emm..err.. a lot. and now, she's still bugging me. she's getting louder n louder by the day i tell u.
no, i'm not crazy. i'm just a proof that ally macbeal is not alone.
maybe she appears cos I say less these days. i think the amount i talk to everybody at the office or at home is in a week is the same amount as wat i used to chitchat with hetz n shaz back then, or shina n yea.. or anybody IN A DAY. the only person to lessen the gap is jazmi cos i talk to him 24/7 and yet, he is one competitive chatter to have, cos both of us can be a keen talker when together. (and i dont suppose that's a jiwang remark non/mal!) but one mere person.. this is not healthy.
so while the real me is on silent mode, in fact very2 silent as referred to as my colleagues (shaz n hetz will be laughing their ass off), the little me inside will do all the talking, like it or not, for only me to hear.
dont get me wrong though, i'm not lonely in my office. almost never.
afterall, a self-lover will never really despise a quiet chat with herself.
i hate to say this, though i mean it, have a GOOD weekend everyone!
Thursday, September 04, 2003
sigh..
that was the fastest 5 days in my life.
and this sunburn is the mildest ever, considering i was baking under the sun at noon for 3 consecutive days.
all in all redang was fine..exactly how i would imagine it would be
all we did was sleep, eat, sleep, scrabble, snorkel, eat, sleep, kayaking, eateateat..pillowfight.
i really2 need the break and wat berjaya resort redang had to offer was perfectly wat it takes for a nice getaway.
the resort is deserted, the only way to get to other resorts or civilisation (wat civilisation) was by boat. the area is endowed with a nice secluded lagoon with the whitest ever sand i've ever seen.. u know the kind in the hourglass.. haa.. that fine, that white. the chalets are along a small fishpond, connected by platform, really serene and very kekampungan..
there were loads of banana leaves around, mama 'curi' some to pack our homemade nasi lemak.
yup, the lady still cook during holidays, cos papa cant swallow hotel food 2 meals in a row.. ehehe.. equipped with a small rice cooker, a pan and a smal portable stove, like one of those 'penunu Bunsen' (Godd!!) except for it's flat. i think that was illegal, to cook in hotel rooms, and it simply made the meal taste much better.
we went snorkelling half a day. slept half a day of the 3 days. eat 4 meals a day,and i mean MEALS.
mama n papa were really on honeymoon mood, that most of the time i've to attend to zetty building some sandcastle, only to be destroyed by cho and abe. but the 2 lovebirds were almost oblivious to us, their kids. let them be lah. it's their 24th anniversary anyway. at least we should be glad they drag us along to their 167th honeymoon holiday.. eheh.. ok, exagerate.
on the way back, we went to kb..ok maybe that was not on the way, but we figured, rather than spending a nite elsewhere and hitting the 6 hrs journe the next day from middle of nowhere, it's better to go back to Tok We's and spending the extra hour or two from kb-kl. Tok We is getting better. She is even strong enough to greet us at the door when we reached her house. I went dead that nite, in the middle of my aunts n uncles chats. to compensate, i woke up early and sat by Tok We to hear her stories...and as always, she got quite a few.
on the way balik, while the rest are sleeping and papa is alternating between nuts, asam, sweets and goreng pisang to avoid sleepiness, i watched Dil To Pagal Hai, alone.
ahahaha.. thanks to the technology that i like most about nissan serena. hindustan to kill my 3 hours of boredom. it work like hell... though it annoys papa to the same amount.
now back in the office.
good news, the buss plan is only to be completed next week. this means i've to come up with the write up ONLY. fuhhh..legaa...
but greeting me in the inbox this morning were pile of "nik, can u attend to this, URGENT"
and some may not even realise that i was on leave for 2 days that they happily mark today NOON as deadline. hah! screw them.. eheheh
on a totally diff note, i received an email from a fren. announcing his wedding to another fren of mine. and these 2 belongs in my closest circle of frens. the first 2 siblings of 18. God, it's happening! As much as i am happy for them, i cant help feeling a teeny bit of fear and quite substantial part of jealousy. Darn, it's happening again, i'm turning into a devil.
while i was away, my dearest.. (aftermuch contemplation, my baby, my man, my boy, my wateva) was looming around here. and everytime he did it, i feel embarassed to the extend of shutting this whole blog down.
but then again
naaahhh!!
enough already
i can hear my boss asking his secretary to call me in..
ta!
p/s: dear, thx for buat2 sibuk while i was away stranded on the island (macamla) which does not have any phone coverage nor a public phone. now u know how i felt when u were in tioman..we're equal now. cheers libra!
that was the fastest 5 days in my life.
and this sunburn is the mildest ever, considering i was baking under the sun at noon for 3 consecutive days.
all in all redang was fine..exactly how i would imagine it would be
all we did was sleep, eat, sleep, scrabble, snorkel, eat, sleep, kayaking, eateateat..pillowfight.
i really2 need the break and wat berjaya resort redang had to offer was perfectly wat it takes for a nice getaway.
the resort is deserted, the only way to get to other resorts or civilisation (wat civilisation) was by boat. the area is endowed with a nice secluded lagoon with the whitest ever sand i've ever seen.. u know the kind in the hourglass.. haa.. that fine, that white. the chalets are along a small fishpond, connected by platform, really serene and very kekampungan..
there were loads of banana leaves around, mama 'curi' some to pack our homemade nasi lemak.
yup, the lady still cook during holidays, cos papa cant swallow hotel food 2 meals in a row.. ehehe.. equipped with a small rice cooker, a pan and a smal portable stove, like one of those 'penunu Bunsen' (Godd!!) except for it's flat. i think that was illegal, to cook in hotel rooms, and it simply made the meal taste much better.
we went snorkelling half a day. slept half a day of the 3 days. eat 4 meals a day,and i mean MEALS.
mama n papa were really on honeymoon mood, that most of the time i've to attend to zetty building some sandcastle, only to be destroyed by cho and abe. but the 2 lovebirds were almost oblivious to us, their kids. let them be lah. it's their 24th anniversary anyway. at least we should be glad they drag us along to their 167th honeymoon holiday.. eheh.. ok, exagerate.
on the way back, we went to kb..ok maybe that was not on the way, but we figured, rather than spending a nite elsewhere and hitting the 6 hrs journe the next day from middle of nowhere, it's better to go back to Tok We's and spending the extra hour or two from kb-kl. Tok We is getting better. She is even strong enough to greet us at the door when we reached her house. I went dead that nite, in the middle of my aunts n uncles chats. to compensate, i woke up early and sat by Tok We to hear her stories...and as always, she got quite a few.
on the way balik, while the rest are sleeping and papa is alternating between nuts, asam, sweets and goreng pisang to avoid sleepiness, i watched Dil To Pagal Hai, alone.
ahahaha.. thanks to the technology that i like most about nissan serena. hindustan to kill my 3 hours of boredom. it work like hell... though it annoys papa to the same amount.
now back in the office.
good news, the buss plan is only to be completed next week. this means i've to come up with the write up ONLY. fuhhh..legaa...
but greeting me in the inbox this morning were pile of "nik, can u attend to this, URGENT"
and some may not even realise that i was on leave for 2 days that they happily mark today NOON as deadline. hah! screw them.. eheheh
on a totally diff note, i received an email from a fren. announcing his wedding to another fren of mine. and these 2 belongs in my closest circle of frens. the first 2 siblings of 18. God, it's happening! As much as i am happy for them, i cant help feeling a teeny bit of fear and quite substantial part of jealousy. Darn, it's happening again, i'm turning into a devil.
while i was away, my dearest.. (aftermuch contemplation, my baby, my man, my boy, my wateva) was looming around here. and everytime he did it, i feel embarassed to the extend of shutting this whole blog down.
but then again
naaahhh!!
enough already
i can hear my boss asking his secretary to call me in..
ta!
p/s: dear, thx for buat2 sibuk while i was away stranded on the island (macamla) which does not have any phone coverage nor a public phone. now u know how i felt when u were in tioman..we're equal now. cheers libra!
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