i dont mean to publicize anything here but i feel the need to jot it down.
an ol fren of mine just called, and at the first 'hello' i know she wasnt ok.. and yes, she cried, and cried.. over a problem that she has been trying to deny. (i was having hard time playing aunt agony, cos 1. it's been soooo long since i played 'mommy' for the society 2.i was in my ultra quiet office, i think they can even hear her cry on the other end)

say, u got 2 guys, who likes u a lot, whom you like. one who's so perfect, financially, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually etc and oh Lord, he's ur bf. and one with flaws here n there, n maybe there n there, suffers complex like most ppl do, an occasional MCP, basically, just human enough yet seems to have the superficial power of understanding u before u can even open ur mouth.. ie, your soulmate or more accurately known as mr x-bf. who would it be?

it's devastating when u're in the muddle of your problems and talking to dear one does not alleviate any of those burden, but you KNOW mr soulmate has his arms open, and they have can automatically turn into your most comfy cry spot, the emotional panadol. Is it not wrong for you to turn to mr soulmate? it's sad when the first person u think of when u wake up everyday is that 'occasional MCP' rather than mr perfect. wat would u do?
seriously, i pun dunnolah. if i were her, i wont decide now, even tho mr MCP (see how mr soulmate turns into mr MCP progressively) gave his kata dua.

for me relationship is a process. having gone through a dynamic one (haha!) i think i've learnt a lot about it in the past couple of yrs, enough to understand that things take time, but it sure pays. i feel like telling her to stop clinging to that guy, (i dunno where i grew this resentment towards this guy i never met, maternal instinct maybe) and start opening up to the other guy. so mr perfect is not perfect afterall. maybe he doesnt know how to give comfort. so dear fren, show him how to. maybe that's the trick of the game. afterall i dont believe in the typical girls attitude of expecting the other half to read their minds. it'll steal the fun and induce gaduh je. been there. ehehe. even in a physical thing like sex pun u have to tell and show how, and we're talking about something as ambigious as feelings here.

i dont believe thing will work out like magic here. i know it sounds so unromantic. but no one will understand u overnite. even yourself. kan?