I’ve a new officemate, whom isn’t a new fren. Welcome hetz, guess our fate n path is getting too funny la kan?

I’ve got so many things in my head now. It’s one of those moments I want and will be as selfish as I can, indulging in my prob. I’m reaching dead end. My final resort, papa n mama has been consulted and yet I’m still blur. There’s no precedent case that I can refer to. I think no one understand me at the moment. I’m veryvery defensive too. It’s a road less traveled, and I’m ready to walk it. But once someone open his/her mouth, I feel weak. I feel I’m veryvery vulnerable. As much as I want to stand up for my decision, something keeps pulling me down, questioning if it IS the RIGHT decision.

Hmm..feel so alone. Even blogging doesn’t help dah. There’s so much to pour out, and so personal to be here.

I’ll be ok, I think. In fact, I am ok. Dah biasa. This thing has been bugging me like forever that I wonder how I’ll be once it’s solved, if it will ever be solved.

Anyhow, weekend was fun. Finally on Saturday pegi IKEA! Mama punya idea la ni.. cos she said it was too hot to stay in. True enuff. Getting loads of idea for my new room in the new house. Was there from noon till dah gelap, then proceed to One Utama pulak. I forgot how it’s like going (window) shopping with my parents. Mmg mencabar. Meanwhile, bought some new rags and beddings for my current room. From the subtle white cotton and pastel cushions to big bright red flowers and stripey yellow n orange flooring. Well, I made it sound gempak je. But the room really had a makeover lah. I’ve rearranged the CDs and guess wat I found?? My CD collection of 400+ mp3s I dloaded when I was in Brisbane. Simply made my day. Bought some scented candle for the room as well, was in the mood. And glad I did.

Also went to this safari pet shop in Power House (the mall connected to IKEA). Found very adorable kittens, those yg ada that ohpleasetakemehome expression. Geram betul. Zetty wanted to buy them there n then, ask to borrow my moneyla mende la.. Hahah..dia tak tau that cute little monter will cost her few rounds of duit raya to buy. But apart from the kittens, I really2 admired the caretaker. She’s very sweet and polite in the most inartificial way. If I were a guy, I would just swipe the plastic card and get the kitten, because of her. Afterall the kitten is only a mth old, need to be there till 3mths for jabs n everything, so there’ll be ample time.. But reallylah.. I admire her gila2 that I told my mom I wanna have a second look at her and strike a conversation cos I like the way she talk so much…
Now I know why I was once a suspected lesbo..