the interview went well... a bit unexpected but it went well..
y unexpected?
"wat are u strength nik?"
"i'm a good team player.. let me say, i'm good with ppl.. (hey, i want the job.. bull pun bull lah!)"
"yeah i know"
" ?"
"u're a libran"
eheh.. weird how they go about finding the weirdest point to differentiate us..
the interviewer was a renong scholar himself. being the first batch, he has been serving renong for 7 years and is very familar with the whole game.. the part where all the players (us, the candidates) are homogenous and therefore it's quite a trick to point our differences. in my opinion.. it cant be that hard.. and this guy know wat he's dealing with.. hence the interview...
i was cornered by some questions.. seriously.. i saw that evil grin on his face.. sheessshh.. but then again he reassure that this interview is not to test me, but really is just a get-to-know session.. so we went from getting to know me to a shocking news of his fren's wedding (to a fren of mine - without his knowledge) then to getting to know my frens... yes.. he actually asked my opinion about my frens who could stand a chance for this post as well. i refused to comment. duhhh... who am i to disclose wat they're like when i know it could affect his judgement and hence their job. but he was being pushy about it..so there u go.. all those lame tasteless words.. nice, good, ok.. ehehe.. wat am i to do kan?
then het'z turn, which lasted about a quarter of my length of interview.. i think the miscommunication about her pursuing masters has been cleared up.. and i guess she'll be flying back downunder.. there u go... my carpool prospect : ( ... which is also my aussie shopping agent.. ehehe.. : )
after the interview we went to lot 10 for lunch then singgah REC to drop something..
met the kakak's of rec for the first time.. i was informed that we'll have to report on the 5th to UEM academy.. i dunno wat's the deal here.. even the lady tak tau the details of the induction herself.. so we'll have to wait n see..
oklah.. nak gi mandi.. going to REC again to make some claim.. then off with ben n dan.. golfing.. ahahaha... since when am i a golfer? u tell me..
Thursday, January 30, 2003
Tuesday, January 28, 2003
well... today was funfilled
called ren0ng the first thing in the morning and found out that i need to send in my picture to time.. hmm.. wat does that suppose to mean?
went for breakfast with novan an hetz in taipan.. more like brunch thing.. had a good set of nasik lemak ayam.. screw the diet!
came back, checked my email and noticed that ren0ng has requested me, hetz, lynnette n shaz to send in our pictures.. hmmm.. this is getting fishy.. y all the girls?? y not nabil, suhaimi n ben?? wat's this? is it something new in recruitment process : female candidates, pls enclose ur picture.. wateva it is.. doesnt sound good to me.
wateva
then me n hetz took a comuter to shah alam.. to meet hafez.. who's gonna drive us to kmys to see them play football..
we're 'a bit' too good for malaysian timing, arrived 1/2 hour earlier so lepak n borak.. figuring out why they have asked us for our pics.. i mean, if this is a normal application process.. well.. of course they need some form of identification out of so many candidates.. but in our case.. usually, they'll only hire.. n there u go.. there's only 6 of us anyway and ren0ng does have our particulars..
well... just when i thought that would consume our 1/2 an hour of waiting.. received a call asking me attend an interview tomorrow at Time.. huh??
so.. tomorrow, i have an interview.. i dunno wat about.. wat company.. wat position.. when to start.. i have no idea at all.. to start with, i dont know if it's an interview for recruitment or an intro to my recruitment.. hmm..
and tomorrow i'll have to pick up my shipment..
and today i'm so damn bloody tired.. macam main bola pun.. but the lift rosak when i was about to go out just now.. so 16 floor.. turun tangga..
u thought turun tangga wont be that bad huh? u try..
oklah.. nak kena prepare wat to wear tomorrow
nite
called ren0ng the first thing in the morning and found out that i need to send in my picture to time.. hmm.. wat does that suppose to mean?
went for breakfast with novan an hetz in taipan.. more like brunch thing.. had a good set of nasik lemak ayam.. screw the diet!
came back, checked my email and noticed that ren0ng has requested me, hetz, lynnette n shaz to send in our pictures.. hmmm.. this is getting fishy.. y all the girls?? y not nabil, suhaimi n ben?? wat's this? is it something new in recruitment process : female candidates, pls enclose ur picture.. wateva it is.. doesnt sound good to me.
wateva
then me n hetz took a comuter to shah alam.. to meet hafez.. who's gonna drive us to kmys to see them play football..
we're 'a bit' too good for malaysian timing, arrived 1/2 hour earlier so lepak n borak.. figuring out why they have asked us for our pics.. i mean, if this is a normal application process.. well.. of course they need some form of identification out of so many candidates.. but in our case.. usually, they'll only hire.. n there u go.. there's only 6 of us anyway and ren0ng does have our particulars..
well... just when i thought that would consume our 1/2 an hour of waiting.. received a call asking me attend an interview tomorrow at Time.. huh??
so.. tomorrow, i have an interview.. i dunno wat about.. wat company.. wat position.. when to start.. i have no idea at all.. to start with, i dont know if it's an interview for recruitment or an intro to my recruitment.. hmm..
and tomorrow i'll have to pick up my shipment..
and today i'm so damn bloody tired.. macam main bola pun.. but the lift rosak when i was about to go out just now.. so 16 floor.. turun tangga..
u thought turun tangga wont be that bad huh? u try..
oklah.. nak kena prepare wat to wear tomorrow
nite
Monday, January 27, 2003
renong called just now but i didnt manage to answer, called back but the officer's out..bet it's about our job placement..
i dont really mind where i'll be posted, anyhow, i'll have to arrange my own transportation.. and to think that the only thing i have to worry about is transportation, i guess i shouldnt worry about it at all, afterall..
just got back from pyramid.. with lynn, lish n hetz..
nothing much, just jalan2.. buang masa.. heh! well, a lot lined up for our next activity.. bowling, sunway lagoon, ice skating? eheh... we're bored. one thing for sure we'll be heading to petaling street soon.. heard so much about it.. and i havent been there for the last.. err...10 years??
shah cancelled our 'nite out' today (no, when it comes to him.. it's not a date).. need to entertain clients... some last minute entertaining i suppose.. aahh.. wateva la.. i dont mind that much actually.. even if he has a new girl and suppose to go out with her tonite pun i dont mind at all as long as he gives ample notice.. i mean, i still hate putting efforts when last2 tak jadi kluar..
still wondering about the call from renong..
well, of course i'm looking forward to it since i am very settled about going to work, in renong.. so this is it.
hetz received similar call, and she's posted to time engineering.. lucky her.. it's right smack in kl.. 5 mins away from klcc, accessible by lrt...
see... i'm worrying about the place again.. come on.. grow up!
oklah
nak mandi
it's a hot day today ey?
i dont really mind where i'll be posted, anyhow, i'll have to arrange my own transportation.. and to think that the only thing i have to worry about is transportation, i guess i shouldnt worry about it at all, afterall..
just got back from pyramid.. with lynn, lish n hetz..
nothing much, just jalan2.. buang masa.. heh! well, a lot lined up for our next activity.. bowling, sunway lagoon, ice skating? eheh... we're bored. one thing for sure we'll be heading to petaling street soon.. heard so much about it.. and i havent been there for the last.. err...10 years??
shah cancelled our 'nite out' today (no, when it comes to him.. it's not a date).. need to entertain clients... some last minute entertaining i suppose.. aahh.. wateva la.. i dont mind that much actually.. even if he has a new girl and suppose to go out with her tonite pun i dont mind at all as long as he gives ample notice.. i mean, i still hate putting efforts when last2 tak jadi kluar..
still wondering about the call from renong..
well, of course i'm looking forward to it since i am very settled about going to work, in renong.. so this is it.
hetz received similar call, and she's posted to time engineering.. lucky her.. it's right smack in kl.. 5 mins away from klcc, accessible by lrt...
see... i'm worrying about the place again.. come on.. grow up!
oklah
nak mandi
it's a hot day today ey?
so a new layout again huh?
i did this when i was in a cheery mood.. hence the color.. i hope i wont hear any complaint.. well, even if there's complaint.. sorry, this is my territory
i've taken off the tag board, maybe for a while.. maybe permanently.. nothing is wrong with it except for it makes this site look.. emm.. tak kemas! u see, i have thing thing with arranging things in certain order only in certain color.. and i figured the tag board doesnt belong here..
anyway, thx for those who has been tagging.. never thought there'd be any.. thx joel, nazrul n hetz.. (that's as far as it goeslah!)
*sigh...
yesterday was tiring.. kemas bilik again.. (must be the hundreth time this week) and then layan zetty with her las ketchup song..yes i did! and yes, i mean dancing away like no one cares. it bothers my bros damn a lot. and that's why i repeat the song again n again just to spite those rascals. well, they did bet i'd end up on 15th floor if i didnt stop..(my place's on the 16th)
just when i thought i'd rumble about how bad my weekend was (no lah.. got myself a cd burner and a 'whole new beginning'..wat more can u ask from a 2 hours shopping).. lynn called, she's on the way, saje pontend class, ajak lepak, and i havent showered yet.
i guess i better go
will elaborate on the 'whole new beginning' later.. well.. if i feel like it
i'm outta here
i did this when i was in a cheery mood.. hence the color.. i hope i wont hear any complaint.. well, even if there's complaint.. sorry, this is my territory
i've taken off the tag board, maybe for a while.. maybe permanently.. nothing is wrong with it except for it makes this site look.. emm.. tak kemas! u see, i have thing thing with arranging things in certain order only in certain color.. and i figured the tag board doesnt belong here..
anyway, thx for those who has been tagging.. never thought there'd be any.. thx joel, nazrul n hetz.. (that's as far as it goeslah!)
*sigh...
yesterday was tiring.. kemas bilik again.. (must be the hundreth time this week) and then layan zetty with her las ketchup song..yes i did! and yes, i mean dancing away like no one cares. it bothers my bros damn a lot. and that's why i repeat the song again n again just to spite those rascals. well, they did bet i'd end up on 15th floor if i didnt stop..(my place's on the 16th)
just when i thought i'd rumble about how bad my weekend was (no lah.. got myself a cd burner and a 'whole new beginning'..wat more can u ask from a 2 hours shopping).. lynn called, she's on the way, saje pontend class, ajak lepak, and i havent showered yet.
i guess i better go
will elaborate on the 'whole new beginning' later.. well.. if i feel like it
i'm outta here
Saturday, January 25, 2003
it's SATURDAY again, and i'm nervous about it..
this may sound a bit absurd but i think i might have weekend-phobia? anyone wanna prescribe me the scientific name?
weekend-phobia = discomfort experienced throughout a weekend due to (huge) possibility that one will be stuck at home, doing nothing, not by his/her choice and not having excuses such as 'my frens are working' and 'i dont have any car to go out'.
i only found 2 remedies at this point
1. go online and read other ppl's journal...(hoping that i'll find 'worse situations')
2. spend time with my bros which normally refer to 'lepak bodoh'
but then, if it's a really bad saturday, even my younger bros will be out with the lot.. swarming the malls, cinemas.. hanging out..
hmm... doesnt sound that interesting afterall huh?
i guess this saturday is one of those really terrible one, yeh's talking with his fren in the background..."KLCC XGame jom.. jumpa kau kat KJ setengah jam.. call mir.. blablablaa.."
cho is already out.. to his tution class which last 2 hours but normally means a whole day out..
papa n mama's out with zetty, they're going to the hillhome later..
abe is still at home.. all dressed up.. looks like i'll be alone with bibik.. again..
hmm.. actually, do i really mind?
maybe not
maybe
ok.. on another note.. i've resolved to a self formulated diet plan... actually a slightly different lifestyle..
decided that if i'm going to stay sedentary like this.. i might as well be dead.
i did a full research on diet plans, calories count, exercises and stuff yesterday, even went thru the motivation parts too.. ehehe..
oh well... better make full use of my internet usage huh?
will this work out? i dunno... even if it's not.. at least im leading a better life..
the rate is very2 slow.. like a pound a week?.. nothing like the one that all those slimming centre shout lah..
aahh... wateva.. i'm not being hard on myself i hope.. actually i think this is being 'kind'
what aggravate this?
a simple math.. if i've gained around 5 kilos since i arrived a month a go (yes, i did!)... it wouldnt take that long before it requires a crane to move me from my room to the toilet next door.. a bit exagerated? maybe.. ehehe
afterall, i kept thinking... if i were to have a good start to my working life, might as well start off with a good first impression.. and even if there's vast individuals out there who strongly disagree with this.. i still believe ur physical appearances still says a lot about ur self management.. hence..
and apart from the working life..
if i were to embark on a new beginning.. ie get married .. say in 2 or 3 years time.. i should start getting ready for it now.. shouldnt i?
getting ready means, securing a good job, buy my own car.. tak menyusahkan my husband, learn the necessary skills.. and look nice..
now look nice.. this is all these efforts fit in.. i know i know, i want that person to like me for who i am and not how i look like n all .. but if i care about him enuff.. i would wanna look my best for him.. so, even there's no him now.. looking ur best doesnt happen in a blink, does it?..
heheh..
weird.. typing all that makes me feel good already.. hmmmpph..
i think i'm going to change this layout again
who's that telling me to get a life??
this is my life..
this may sound a bit absurd but i think i might have weekend-phobia? anyone wanna prescribe me the scientific name?
weekend-phobia = discomfort experienced throughout a weekend due to (huge) possibility that one will be stuck at home, doing nothing, not by his/her choice and not having excuses such as 'my frens are working' and 'i dont have any car to go out'.
i only found 2 remedies at this point
1. go online and read other ppl's journal...(hoping that i'll find 'worse situations')
2. spend time with my bros which normally refer to 'lepak bodoh'
but then, if it's a really bad saturday, even my younger bros will be out with the lot.. swarming the malls, cinemas.. hanging out..
hmm... doesnt sound that interesting afterall huh?
i guess this saturday is one of those really terrible one, yeh's talking with his fren in the background..."KLCC XGame jom.. jumpa kau kat KJ setengah jam.. call mir.. blablablaa.."
cho is already out.. to his tution class which last 2 hours but normally means a whole day out..
papa n mama's out with zetty, they're going to the hillhome later..
abe is still at home.. all dressed up.. looks like i'll be alone with bibik.. again..
hmm.. actually, do i really mind?
maybe not
maybe
ok.. on another note.. i've resolved to a self formulated diet plan... actually a slightly different lifestyle..
decided that if i'm going to stay sedentary like this.. i might as well be dead.
i did a full research on diet plans, calories count, exercises and stuff yesterday, even went thru the motivation parts too.. ehehe..
oh well... better make full use of my internet usage huh?
will this work out? i dunno... even if it's not.. at least im leading a better life..
the rate is very2 slow.. like a pound a week?.. nothing like the one that all those slimming centre shout lah..
aahh... wateva.. i'm not being hard on myself i hope.. actually i think this is being 'kind'
what aggravate this?
a simple math.. if i've gained around 5 kilos since i arrived a month a go (yes, i did!)... it wouldnt take that long before it requires a crane to move me from my room to the toilet next door.. a bit exagerated? maybe.. ehehe
afterall, i kept thinking... if i were to have a good start to my working life, might as well start off with a good first impression.. and even if there's vast individuals out there who strongly disagree with this.. i still believe ur physical appearances still says a lot about ur self management.. hence..
and apart from the working life..
if i were to embark on a new beginning.. ie get married .. say in 2 or 3 years time.. i should start getting ready for it now.. shouldnt i?
getting ready means, securing a good job, buy my own car.. tak menyusahkan my husband, learn the necessary skills.. and look nice..
now look nice.. this is all these efforts fit in.. i know i know, i want that person to like me for who i am and not how i look like n all .. but if i care about him enuff.. i would wanna look my best for him.. so, even there's no him now.. looking ur best doesnt happen in a blink, does it?..
heheh..
weird.. typing all that makes me feel good already.. hmmmpph..
i think i'm going to change this layout again
who's that telling me to get a life??
this is my life..
Friday, January 24, 2003
finally, i went to Gazebo last nite.
i'd say the place is a neat hang out place, it's just 5 mins from my place anyway. i like the environment, well-lit, clean, and nothing too sophisticated about it, so i guess those ppl there are really hang-outers like me and not another wannabes or show offs..
right
but one thing for sure... it is so so damn pricey... RM9 for a nasi lemak ayam.. go figure!
i suppose there are many other hang out spot which i can afford.. so fret not.. *sigh... i'm a penganggur afterall
went out the whole day yesterday..
hetz called after an hour of work out.. went to one utama for lunch and then to lynn's..
we managed to steal a glance at lynn's bro's boobs (??!).. not that he has one all these while.. that's y it was such a thrill to see.. minus the boobs, he is still one good looking hunk.. the one we used to adore since high school days.. and he's getting married this yr.. hmm.. oh well
then we're off to my place.. before going to gazebo..
yes, it was indeed a full day out.. a day of eating and bitching, going thru magazines and make up discussions.. hey, dont get me wrong, we're no girly2.. that's y we still have such discussion at the age of 23... far off huh?
i think i've come to term with the fact that i'm not with jazmi anymore.. i dunno why, but that came to me last nite
i guess i'm no more in that 'find-me-a-man' state.. really..
so if there's no jazmi, let it be no man.. well at least till i really2 found one..
the key here is.. no way i'm going to look for him.. (they say the good ones appear when u're not looking..)
still, i'd say i'm single and looking though....hehehe....really, if there's this part where u feel glad u're single after a break up.. i think this is it.. maybe i'm not exactly glad , but i'm definitely ok with it..
sooo...
today, mama has given me the layout and materials for her co's corp profile..
and i'm suppose to put things together.. and produce one.. i'm guessing i'm expected to finish this soon.. and at no cost..
might as well put together a website for it.. well offline one.. she has mention about it..
once in a while, produce something beyond her expectation.. (well other than the monthly internet/phone bill)
alrighty then..
work to do... (been a while huh)
i'd say the place is a neat hang out place, it's just 5 mins from my place anyway. i like the environment, well-lit, clean, and nothing too sophisticated about it, so i guess those ppl there are really hang-outers like me and not another wannabes or show offs..
right
but one thing for sure... it is so so damn pricey... RM9 for a nasi lemak ayam.. go figure!
i suppose there are many other hang out spot which i can afford.. so fret not.. *sigh... i'm a penganggur afterall
went out the whole day yesterday..
hetz called after an hour of work out.. went to one utama for lunch and then to lynn's..
we managed to steal a glance at lynn's bro's boobs (??!).. not that he has one all these while.. that's y it was such a thrill to see.. minus the boobs, he is still one good looking hunk.. the one we used to adore since high school days.. and he's getting married this yr.. hmm.. oh well
then we're off to my place.. before going to gazebo..
yes, it was indeed a full day out.. a day of eating and bitching, going thru magazines and make up discussions.. hey, dont get me wrong, we're no girly2.. that's y we still have such discussion at the age of 23... far off huh?
i think i've come to term with the fact that i'm not with jazmi anymore.. i dunno why, but that came to me last nite
i guess i'm no more in that 'find-me-a-man' state.. really..
so if there's no jazmi, let it be no man.. well at least till i really2 found one..
the key here is.. no way i'm going to look for him.. (they say the good ones appear when u're not looking..)
still, i'd say i'm single and looking though....hehehe....really, if there's this part where u feel glad u're single after a break up.. i think this is it.. maybe i'm not exactly glad , but i'm definitely ok with it..
sooo...
today, mama has given me the layout and materials for her co's corp profile..
and i'm suppose to put things together.. and produce one.. i'm guessing i'm expected to finish this soon.. and at no cost..
might as well put together a website for it.. well offline one.. she has mention about it..
once in a while, produce something beyond her expectation.. (well other than the monthly internet/phone bill)
alrighty then..
work to do... (been a while huh)
Wednesday, January 22, 2003
Usually, waking up late here in Malaysia would mean a disastrous day for me..no matter how hard i try.. missing the morning sunshine is just like a curse to me..hence, naturally, i hate waking up to a mature daylight.. which i cant avoid since my room now seem to capture it. (u see it's pretty different brisbane - the land of sunshine, since my room is perfectly hidden from all sort of natural light invasion)
Today i woke up late, feeling all good inside.. i dont know y..
didnt remember having a dream that good last nite. in fact, the sleep wasnt that good either..(i hate sharing bed with that little creature - my sis)
but i woke up at 11 am.. only by the scream of my sis who just came back from sekolah agama..
had brunch.. then came online.. was browsing some sites.. still, in a peculiarly good mood.
i cleared my wardrobe today.. learnt that half of wat's inside that wrecked old closet wasnt even mine..
my shipment will be arriving soon, so i better make some space for it.
there were 5 boxes in my closet..containing letters, cards, pictures, trophies and cds..
with much hesitant, i went through all of them... i dunno why i kept all these stuff.. some date way back in 1980s.. raya card from a fren in primary school for God sake..
then came the worst part.. choosing which one to throw away.. and which one to keep till the next spring cleaning.. or when i need more space..
i keep on consoling myself whenever i chuck a card into the waste bin.. felt bad about it..
i dunno why i'm so affected by garbage of this quantity...
but as i open each and every card.. i realised they were no garbage.. they're all treasure to me.. having ppl write (or even create) some cards like these for u.. really make u feel all glowy inside..
but, wat surprised me was finding out that the persons who regularly send me cards are the ones that i least expect, the ones that i never mention, never thought of calling, the ones that i would refer to as 'acquaintances'... that i took for granted..
i feel ashamed.. somehow i feel bad
funny how i fiddle to find meaningful stuff to do to fill up my honeymoon days..
only to find that it only take one fatefull afternoon of spring cleaning to realise that i was someone special to many, and how i took most of them for granted.
i also realised how i've changed over the years..
i guess i can only sigh n smile now..
really, i'm lost of words now..
later
Today i woke up late, feeling all good inside.. i dont know y..
didnt remember having a dream that good last nite. in fact, the sleep wasnt that good either..(i hate sharing bed with that little creature - my sis)
but i woke up at 11 am.. only by the scream of my sis who just came back from sekolah agama..
had brunch.. then came online.. was browsing some sites.. still, in a peculiarly good mood.
i cleared my wardrobe today.. learnt that half of wat's inside that wrecked old closet wasnt even mine..
my shipment will be arriving soon, so i better make some space for it.
there were 5 boxes in my closet..containing letters, cards, pictures, trophies and cds..
with much hesitant, i went through all of them... i dunno why i kept all these stuff.. some date way back in 1980s.. raya card from a fren in primary school for God sake..
then came the worst part.. choosing which one to throw away.. and which one to keep till the next spring cleaning.. or when i need more space..
i keep on consoling myself whenever i chuck a card into the waste bin.. felt bad about it..
i dunno why i'm so affected by garbage of this quantity...
but as i open each and every card.. i realised they were no garbage.. they're all treasure to me.. having ppl write (or even create) some cards like these for u.. really make u feel all glowy inside..
but, wat surprised me was finding out that the persons who regularly send me cards are the ones that i least expect, the ones that i never mention, never thought of calling, the ones that i would refer to as 'acquaintances'... that i took for granted..
i feel ashamed.. somehow i feel bad
funny how i fiddle to find meaningful stuff to do to fill up my honeymoon days..
only to find that it only take one fatefull afternoon of spring cleaning to realise that i was someone special to many, and how i took most of them for granted.
i also realised how i've changed over the years..
i guess i can only sigh n smile now..
really, i'm lost of words now..
later
Monday, January 20, 2003
hah!
it's working...
but the pics...
it came out just now, then i dunno where i screw up again..
takpelah..
later..later..
somehow i feel weird about having the left side a bit long winded.. hmm...
i shall try to do something about it laterlah then..
meanwhile..check this out.. sacked for blogging?? come on!!
but.. really, this is serious matter
it's working...
but the pics...
it came out just now, then i dunno where i screw up again..
takpelah..
later..later..
somehow i feel weird about having the left side a bit long winded.. hmm...
i shall try to do something about it laterlah then..
meanwhile..check this out.. sacked for blogging?? come on!!
but.. really, this is serious matter
hello
in the midst of chucking in a tag board (to prove no one really visit this place??)
choosing the right color n stuff..
weekend was a disaster..
realising the fact that i dont have that many frens (or frens that dont have that much time for lepak2 n catching up) doesnt seem to shake me anymore..
biasalah.. last saturday, i called each and every frens whose number i can get hold on..
to much dismay of course.. family commitments, open house (come on!), work n spring cleanings came between us
saturday was depressing..
followed by an even more damaging sunday..
i shall not remind myself of the state i was in the last 48 hours..
let me just say, Thank God my parents decided to go lunch-shop-dinner outside.. i hope i'm wrong here... but isnt it pathetic to be 23 and still depend on my parents to go out shopping with..?
hmmm...
back to my tag attempt..
ta!
in the midst of chucking in a tag board (to prove no one really visit this place??)
choosing the right color n stuff..
weekend was a disaster..
realising the fact that i dont have that many frens (or frens that dont have that much time for lepak2 n catching up) doesnt seem to shake me anymore..
biasalah.. last saturday, i called each and every frens whose number i can get hold on..
to much dismay of course.. family commitments, open house (come on!), work n spring cleanings came between us
saturday was depressing..
followed by an even more damaging sunday..
i shall not remind myself of the state i was in the last 48 hours..
let me just say, Thank God my parents decided to go lunch-shop-dinner outside.. i hope i'm wrong here... but isnt it pathetic to be 23 and still depend on my parents to go out shopping with..?
hmmm...
back to my tag attempt..
ta!
Sunday, January 19, 2003
hi again,
well, it does..
apparently, i cant simply cut n paste stuff here..cos it wont be posted/published..
typed a lenghty one the other day, just felt like it.. but then takleh post... darn!
oh well...
syude called just now..
i guess she's a total new person now..
she sounds different.. and my God.. she's earning 5 digits in like.. how many months again?
it really bugs me.. it bugs me a great deal, especially when i'm redundant and idle like this..
takpelah, since renong has confirmed that there'll be jobs for us, soon.. i'm glad enuff
banyak story with syude..
she's one of those (few) frens of mine that give me 'it feels like yesterday' feeling
we havent met, or talk for the past 12 months.. emails? ehehe... two or three.. forwarded stuff..
but then.. it feels as comfy as before just now.. she might sound different.. but she's the same old syude to me..
the fren in her is still there.. and it is so, so good to know that i still have frens like that.. especially, after a pretty depressing and over-eating day..
we chit chat for a while (understatement), exchange stories about each other.. exchange stories about others (=gossips).. and we talk a lot.. about our life path..
yes.. we do sound like a motivation article somewhere but that's how we are.. we talk about stuff which others normally utter to themselves cos it may sound too lame to be said out loud..
it feels good to know that there's someone who shares all my fears..even to the small little silly ones..especially those small little silly ones..
and it feels good to have someone who trust u enuff to confess their imperfections.. and point out yours pulak tu..cool..
oh well.. i'm just glad she's my fren.. and even more so.. i'm glad she's making big bucks.. though it bugs me.. (ya Allah, jauhkanla aku dari hasad dengki..ehehe)
aahh... just wat i need.. a rich working GOOD fren..suddenly i feel the need to highlight the 'good' part..
anyway,
it's late
if i cant just live my dream just yet, maybe i'll go dream about it first..
nite!
well, it does..
apparently, i cant simply cut n paste stuff here..cos it wont be posted/published..
typed a lenghty one the other day, just felt like it.. but then takleh post... darn!
oh well...
syude called just now..
i guess she's a total new person now..
she sounds different.. and my God.. she's earning 5 digits in like.. how many months again?
it really bugs me.. it bugs me a great deal, especially when i'm redundant and idle like this..
takpelah, since renong has confirmed that there'll be jobs for us, soon.. i'm glad enuff
banyak story with syude..
she's one of those (few) frens of mine that give me 'it feels like yesterday' feeling
we havent met, or talk for the past 12 months.. emails? ehehe... two or three.. forwarded stuff..
but then.. it feels as comfy as before just now.. she might sound different.. but she's the same old syude to me..
the fren in her is still there.. and it is so, so good to know that i still have frens like that.. especially, after a pretty depressing and over-eating day..
we chit chat for a while (understatement), exchange stories about each other.. exchange stories about others (=gossips).. and we talk a lot.. about our life path..
yes.. we do sound like a motivation article somewhere but that's how we are.. we talk about stuff which others normally utter to themselves cos it may sound too lame to be said out loud..
it feels good to know that there's someone who shares all my fears..even to the small little silly ones..especially those small little silly ones..
and it feels good to have someone who trust u enuff to confess their imperfections.. and point out yours pulak tu..cool..
oh well.. i'm just glad she's my fren.. and even more so.. i'm glad she's making big bucks.. though it bugs me.. (ya Allah, jauhkanla aku dari hasad dengki..ehehe)
aahh... just wat i need.. a rich working GOOD fren..suddenly i feel the need to highlight the 'good' part..
anyway,
it's late
if i cant just live my dream just yet, maybe i'll go dream about it first..
nite!
Friday, January 17, 2003
nothing much occured in the past 72 hours..
just few phonecalls here n there
went out with frens to klcc for lunch 2 days ago..
it was a good move.. ramai giler org lunch.. and oh My.. they look available.
yeah yeah, desperate me..
alah..bukan kacau pun.. if guys can cuci mata, who said girls cant??
working males in shirts n ties.. hmm...
suddenly i realised i've moved into another category dah... a big jump i suppose
his college n his course doesnt interest me anymore.. now it's more about where do u work n wat do u do mister? (or to be more frank..how much u earn? ehehe..naaaahh)
called Renong this morning, apparently, there are jobs waiting for us.. but they havent finalise who's going where..
wow.. i was somehow excited... then realised..oh my God.. i'm gonna work..
this is the beginning of my slavery.. for the rest of my life.. (yeah right...being the kind that suppose getting married n breeding the top most priority.. i dont think i'll die a working woman)
anyway..
i'm back into my chatting mode
though i'm very (prejudicely) selective this time..
malas la.. knowing me, i'll get along with anyone.. so better make it a worthwhile one..
well.. there's this guy who constantly calls n msg.. he's cool..
i guess i'll meet him soon.. let's not go into details.. cos u know chatters.. they can come up with surprises a little bit later.. so let's not sound all too excited
(he's a CA by the way..ehehe)
i hope i'm wise enuff this time..
-no more attached guys.. no way no more.. i'm better off alone than being with a party of two.. (well..not that i have any particular experience before)
-no english challenged guys.. not that mine is strikingly superb.. but if his english can annoy me.. wat's the use of a marginal english pun kan
well.. i said i was being prejudice..
somehow i felt mean in my selection.. padahal.. sesaja nak chat je pun.. but if we cant produce worthwhile conversation, buat apa..
being a desperate person i am now.. and having frens who are well informed about it.. makes it no easier..
i hope the next guy (i hope, really hope..the one) will be someone that i'm not settling for.. thus the rigid selection.. hehe.
afterall there's this thing with people nowadays - he's not good enuff for her.. or vice versa.. and that..really kills me..
oh, by the way..(i'm really in the mood to tell stories huh?)
there's this guy.. i think i mention somewhere in this blog before..
just a casual fren i've known for almost 2 yrs..
anyway, wat bugs me is his super sensitive, jealous, obsessive, posessive girl..
not that i really2 mind her.. the fact that i knew him before they even get together says a lot
but, wat is wrong with her.. if the objective of her being with him is just to shoo away all his girlfren.. then.. i think she's in for more hassle than a girl should have in a relationship..ehehe.. i mean.. chill out la.. if he's after me, he would be really after me since then.. y whould he wanna be with u in the first place...
the thing is.. i havent been in much contact with his guy anyway.. and come on.. pure frenship between guys n girls do exist..
dont tell me she doesnt have any guy fren.. u know that comfy cry spot..
if only i could reach this girl..(but since she hasnt launch any verbal/physical attack on me.. i'd rather buzz off)
poor thing
u can have him all to urself lah miss..
sometimes u dont realise wat u have till u lose it..
if he can trust u with some freedom.. y should u be so uptight about his freedom
does he owe that much to u? wat is it have u done for him that u can claim possesion over him..
(even the lady who brought him to earth have some trust in him)
sometimes u will lose someone by just holding a little too tight.. expecting too much
u get me girl?
(as though she's reading.. actually i hope she would be.. too wishfull i think..eheh)
if u dont see me in the next entry..
or.. this site went berserk..
u should know y.. ( i hope she's not some computer/hacker freak..)
anyway, i meant well
so.. my sis..
relax.. peace!
aaaaa....shaz
Happy 2* Birthday!! Remember, as always.. it's just a number! : )
just few phonecalls here n there
went out with frens to klcc for lunch 2 days ago..
it was a good move.. ramai giler org lunch.. and oh My.. they look available.
yeah yeah, desperate me..
alah..bukan kacau pun.. if guys can cuci mata, who said girls cant??
working males in shirts n ties.. hmm...
suddenly i realised i've moved into another category dah... a big jump i suppose
his college n his course doesnt interest me anymore.. now it's more about where do u work n wat do u do mister? (or to be more frank..how much u earn? ehehe..naaaahh)
called Renong this morning, apparently, there are jobs waiting for us.. but they havent finalise who's going where..
wow.. i was somehow excited... then realised..oh my God.. i'm gonna work..
this is the beginning of my slavery.. for the rest of my life.. (yeah right...being the kind that suppose getting married n breeding the top most priority.. i dont think i'll die a working woman)
anyway..
i'm back into my chatting mode
though i'm very (prejudicely) selective this time..
malas la.. knowing me, i'll get along with anyone.. so better make it a worthwhile one..
well.. there's this guy who constantly calls n msg.. he's cool..
i guess i'll meet him soon.. let's not go into details.. cos u know chatters.. they can come up with surprises a little bit later.. so let's not sound all too excited
(he's a CA by the way..ehehe)
i hope i'm wise enuff this time..
-no more attached guys.. no way no more.. i'm better off alone than being with a party of two.. (well..not that i have any particular experience before)
-no english challenged guys.. not that mine is strikingly superb.. but if his english can annoy me.. wat's the use of a marginal english pun kan
well.. i said i was being prejudice..
somehow i felt mean in my selection.. padahal.. sesaja nak chat je pun.. but if we cant produce worthwhile conversation, buat apa..
being a desperate person i am now.. and having frens who are well informed about it.. makes it no easier..
i hope the next guy (i hope, really hope..the one) will be someone that i'm not settling for.. thus the rigid selection.. hehe.
afterall there's this thing with people nowadays - he's not good enuff for her.. or vice versa.. and that..really kills me..
oh, by the way..(i'm really in the mood to tell stories huh?)
there's this guy.. i think i mention somewhere in this blog before..
just a casual fren i've known for almost 2 yrs..
anyway, wat bugs me is his super sensitive, jealous, obsessive, posessive girl..
not that i really2 mind her.. the fact that i knew him before they even get together says a lot
but, wat is wrong with her.. if the objective of her being with him is just to shoo away all his girlfren.. then.. i think she's in for more hassle than a girl should have in a relationship..ehehe.. i mean.. chill out la.. if he's after me, he would be really after me since then.. y whould he wanna be with u in the first place...
the thing is.. i havent been in much contact with his guy anyway.. and come on.. pure frenship between guys n girls do exist..
dont tell me she doesnt have any guy fren.. u know that comfy cry spot..
if only i could reach this girl..(but since she hasnt launch any verbal/physical attack on me.. i'd rather buzz off)
poor thing
u can have him all to urself lah miss..
sometimes u dont realise wat u have till u lose it..
if he can trust u with some freedom.. y should u be so uptight about his freedom
does he owe that much to u? wat is it have u done for him that u can claim possesion over him..
(even the lady who brought him to earth have some trust in him)
sometimes u will lose someone by just holding a little too tight.. expecting too much
u get me girl?
(as though she's reading.. actually i hope she would be.. too wishfull i think..eheh)
if u dont see me in the next entry..
or.. this site went berserk..
u should know y.. ( i hope she's not some computer/hacker freak..)
anyway, i meant well
so.. my sis..
relax.. peace!
aaaaa....shaz
Happy 2* Birthday!! Remember, as always.. it's just a number! : )
Tuesday, January 14, 2003
hi ying
still not satisfied with the current template..
ahh..wateva..
been a while.. but i've been doing nothing much anyway
finally back bloggin from my dear boy
most of the songs selamat, some of the pics and all of my work documents..
yg lain gone..
nanti2lah get an installer.. nak install balik all of the stuff..
called jazmi last nite..
he's fine.. alhamdulillah.. maybe will be registering for his studies next May, and his room improvement project is almost complete..
been to lots of movies and been going out every weekend with his hsemates.. cool..
he really sounds good last nite.. cannot imagine it was something that he put up for me.. which i dont think so
went out with yea the other day.. for pure indugence..
i tried my office attire the other day.. oh my.. really, really got to do something
been fasting for 2 days already... bayar nazar dulu.. a week hutang
i have to la..
have to.. at least another 10 kilos this year..
a'ha.. i havent any new year resolution this year
so let this be it..
10 kilos off by end of 2003
that's less than a kilo a month.. takkan tak leh kot..
hmm..
now, am i vain or wat??
vain pun vainla..
it's for my own good (afterall, puasa nazar, puasa ganti memang kena perform pun)
so i'm doing this for myself.. puas hati.. senang beli baju.. senang cari boyfren (i still believe physical attraction goes a long way)
memang there are those who doesnt mind (or perhaps, prefer) these kind of 'above average' girls ni but i dont think that provides me enough security..most of them are attached anyway.. u see.. demand supply disequilibrium..
what to do?
so, 2003.. here comes .. Ying..the vain.
still not satisfied with the current template..
ahh..wateva..
been a while.. but i've been doing nothing much anyway
finally back bloggin from my dear boy
most of the songs selamat, some of the pics and all of my work documents..
yg lain gone..
nanti2lah get an installer.. nak install balik all of the stuff..
called jazmi last nite..
he's fine.. alhamdulillah.. maybe will be registering for his studies next May, and his room improvement project is almost complete..
been to lots of movies and been going out every weekend with his hsemates.. cool..
he really sounds good last nite.. cannot imagine it was something that he put up for me.. which i dont think so
went out with yea the other day.. for pure indugence..
i tried my office attire the other day.. oh my.. really, really got to do something
been fasting for 2 days already... bayar nazar dulu.. a week hutang
i have to la..
have to.. at least another 10 kilos this year..
a'ha.. i havent any new year resolution this year
so let this be it..
10 kilos off by end of 2003
that's less than a kilo a month.. takkan tak leh kot..
hmm..
now, am i vain or wat??
vain pun vainla..
it's for my own good (afterall, puasa nazar, puasa ganti memang kena perform pun)
so i'm doing this for myself.. puas hati.. senang beli baju.. senang cari boyfren (i still believe physical attraction goes a long way)
memang there are those who doesnt mind (or perhaps, prefer) these kind of 'above average' girls ni but i dont think that provides me enough security..most of them are attached anyway.. u see.. demand supply disequilibrium..
what to do?
so, 2003.. here comes .. Ying..the vain.
Sunday, January 12, 2003
hi ying
cool sunday morning
woke up early as tok we is leaving for KB today..
joe n his wife spent the day at home today
nothing really planned for the day..
maybe will go pick up my dear boy from pyramid..
the guy called yesterday, he's fine, back from his coma, only the c drive je affected..and even so, most of the data are safe.. alhamdulillah..
yess... next week kalau bosan2... memang build websitela jawabnya..
been to few ppl's website.. jeles lah pulak..
but if i were to have one.. nak tulis apa ek.. not an exhibist by nature..(yeah right! eheh)
it's just the creating n building part tu yg fascinate me most..
but to start with, maybe i should make this blog more interactive.. maybe..
anyway, semalam called win, it's scary finally we're out of topic to talk about..
learnt from mama that air asia is having a huge ticket sale.. gila2..nak gi kk, kelantan, kuching, kuantan, mana2 lagi ntah for RM10
saje2 asked mama if i could take the opportunity nak jalan2 sikit..maybe nak gi kk.. she said..'Haaaa..why not?'
ish...peluang ni.. hetz n me baru je cakap pasal nak gi s'wak n sabah..
but since she'll only be back from spore today, maybe the idea may not amuse her sangatla...
but ok gak kan.. $20 return.. alah..kalau plus tax ke, minyak kete hantar airport, tol...paling2 pun $50 je kot..
hmm... tapi tu lah.. mr pilot win must be pretty busy around that time i think..
confirm ngan win dulu..
but kalau gi sorang.. kekok gak, mati kutu jugak kot..
gila ah.. cakap ngan win thru phone semalam pun dah habis idea..
i'd like to go.. but now thinking maybe it's not so good n idea..
malas nak menyusahkan org yg memang tgh sibuk..
aaahh..amik komputer dulu ah!
by the way... win suruh dgr that flop poppy's song (juara lagu 2002) tonite "Lagu tu..for u" he said...and since i dont know which song masuk juara lagu, i assumed it could be that Aku dan Kamu. hari ni, log in pc je, dgr la lagu tu in my bro's playlist.. sheeshh.. the lyrics... that's mean.. terasa dah gak..
but then check again... err salah lagulah pulak.. so the 'Cinta' song.. now we're talking..ehehe..
anyway, thx dear.
bless u
ta!
cool sunday morning
woke up early as tok we is leaving for KB today..
joe n his wife spent the day at home today
nothing really planned for the day..
maybe will go pick up my dear boy from pyramid..
the guy called yesterday, he's fine, back from his coma, only the c drive je affected..and even so, most of the data are safe.. alhamdulillah..
yess... next week kalau bosan2... memang build websitela jawabnya..
been to few ppl's website.. jeles lah pulak..
but if i were to have one.. nak tulis apa ek.. not an exhibist by nature..(yeah right! eheh)
it's just the creating n building part tu yg fascinate me most..
but to start with, maybe i should make this blog more interactive.. maybe..
anyway, semalam called win, it's scary finally we're out of topic to talk about..
learnt from mama that air asia is having a huge ticket sale.. gila2..nak gi kk, kelantan, kuching, kuantan, mana2 lagi ntah for RM10
saje2 asked mama if i could take the opportunity nak jalan2 sikit..maybe nak gi kk.. she said..'Haaaa..why not?'
ish...peluang ni.. hetz n me baru je cakap pasal nak gi s'wak n sabah..
but since she'll only be back from spore today, maybe the idea may not amuse her sangatla...
but ok gak kan.. $20 return.. alah..kalau plus tax ke, minyak kete hantar airport, tol...paling2 pun $50 je kot..
hmm... tapi tu lah.. mr pilot win must be pretty busy around that time i think..
confirm ngan win dulu..
but kalau gi sorang.. kekok gak, mati kutu jugak kot..
gila ah.. cakap ngan win thru phone semalam pun dah habis idea..
i'd like to go.. but now thinking maybe it's not so good n idea..
malas nak menyusahkan org yg memang tgh sibuk..
aaahh..amik komputer dulu ah!
by the way... win suruh dgr that flop poppy's song (juara lagu 2002) tonite "Lagu tu..for u" he said...and since i dont know which song masuk juara lagu, i assumed it could be that Aku dan Kamu. hari ni, log in pc je, dgr la lagu tu in my bro's playlist.. sheeshh.. the lyrics... that's mean.. terasa dah gak..
but then check again... err salah lagulah pulak.. so the 'Cinta' song.. now we're talking..ehehe..
anyway, thx dear.
bless u
ta!
Thursday, January 09, 2003
this morning
while applying olive oil to tok we's dry n seasoned skin..
"Ida akhir tahun ni doh.. Aman pun nok nikoh do'oh doh.." Tok We said in her forever-cool tone
Translation
Ida will be getting married end of this year. Aman will follow soon
Meaning
My cousin, Ida, 25 is getting married. Aman, her bro, 23, is just waiting for the mom's green light.
What it really means
When is my turn??
True enough, Tok We did ask about me.. wat about me, next year she asked.. well i said insyaAllah, if i can find the groom this year..
She was not expecting i'd say that, since, like everyone else in my extended family, she assumed that i always have a boyfren.
I think they're still stucked in that 'if-she-always-go-out-she-must-have-someone' age. I dont blame them anyway. I tend to have more guy frens and hence i always go out with guys.
My extended family is a very typical Kelantanese family with exception of Tok We (if she SUGGESTED i marry a mat salleh, i dont think she could even be a typical malay granma, can she?). We all tend to marry each other (dont say it's disgusting, some of the products are of good quality, but then again, SOME). We marry early (or else why would i even bother with this topic at 23). Most of us can cook, very well, and cooking is a vital skill among our women. We stay n move in herds during hari raya. Most of us are either business partners, or involved in some kind of own business.
The one that bothers me is - we marry early. I wish i could conform to this tradition but at the rate things are going now..hmm.. i guess i shouldnt put too much hope. My parents are married at the age of 24, and they became parents at 25. All of my cousins which are older than me, are married. In terms of seniority, i'm next in line, on both my parent's side (If the younger ones starts tying the knots jugak, i'd simply die..they're still infants to get married, pls dont do it to me)..And now people are asking..
Usually if u're still studying u'll always have that excuse. I guess i dont have that luxury anymore.
But i guess what really puts me under pressure is realising that i am ready to settle down (wooohooooo!!!!) yet not having someone to settle down with.
i suppose i am already shoo-ing off all my male readers (if i have any)
and if i continue i would put myself down as the most pathetic girl in 2003- and it's only january
oklah..
need to pick up tok we and mama from the clinic..
we'll see wat she have to say next time..
that old lady rocks!!
ta!
while applying olive oil to tok we's dry n seasoned skin..
"Ida akhir tahun ni doh.. Aman pun nok nikoh do'oh doh.." Tok We said in her forever-cool tone
Translation
Ida will be getting married end of this year. Aman will follow soon
Meaning
My cousin, Ida, 25 is getting married. Aman, her bro, 23, is just waiting for the mom's green light.
What it really means
When is my turn??
True enough, Tok We did ask about me.. wat about me, next year she asked.. well i said insyaAllah, if i can find the groom this year..
She was not expecting i'd say that, since, like everyone else in my extended family, she assumed that i always have a boyfren.
I think they're still stucked in that 'if-she-always-go-out-she-must-have-someone' age. I dont blame them anyway. I tend to have more guy frens and hence i always go out with guys.
My extended family is a very typical Kelantanese family with exception of Tok We (if she SUGGESTED i marry a mat salleh, i dont think she could even be a typical malay granma, can she?). We all tend to marry each other (dont say it's disgusting, some of the products are of good quality, but then again, SOME). We marry early (or else why would i even bother with this topic at 23). Most of us can cook, very well, and cooking is a vital skill among our women. We stay n move in herds during hari raya. Most of us are either business partners, or involved in some kind of own business.
The one that bothers me is - we marry early. I wish i could conform to this tradition but at the rate things are going now..hmm.. i guess i shouldnt put too much hope. My parents are married at the age of 24, and they became parents at 25. All of my cousins which are older than me, are married. In terms of seniority, i'm next in line, on both my parent's side (If the younger ones starts tying the knots jugak, i'd simply die..they're still infants to get married, pls dont do it to me)..And now people are asking..
Usually if u're still studying u'll always have that excuse. I guess i dont have that luxury anymore.
But i guess what really puts me under pressure is realising that i am ready to settle down (wooohooooo!!!!) yet not having someone to settle down with.
i suppose i am already shoo-ing off all my male readers (if i have any)
and if i continue i would put myself down as the most pathetic girl in 2003- and it's only january
oklah..
need to pick up tok we and mama from the clinic..
we'll see wat she have to say next time..
that old lady rocks!!
ta!
Tuesday, January 07, 2003
was dead bored just now..
flipping between mtv, channel v, national geo n cartoon network...
then, again, online for the hundredth time today..
played around with the template..
we'll see wat i'll add on tomorrow..
maybe i should start on my website..
but wat do i put in??
aah...i think i'll call renong tomorrow.. then go n fetch my laptop..
maybe that will give me some things to do..
ta!
flipping between mtv, channel v, national geo n cartoon network...
then, again, online for the hundredth time today..
played around with the template..
we'll see wat i'll add on tomorrow..
maybe i should start on my website..
but wat do i put in??
aah...i think i'll call renong tomorrow.. then go n fetch my laptop..
maybe that will give me some things to do..
ta!
hi ying
been having problem posting my last 2 entries.. geram betul..
nanti2la.. edit n fix balik using my own pc
speaking of which.. memang confirm software problem..
the thing is i dont happen to have the recovery cd.. i dont think it went missing, never remembered having one in the first place..
asked the person to do it for me, for some charge tho..
anyway. yesterday, i was in megamall with lynn n hetz..
takde keje, shopping..(tak berhasil sangat anyway) and tgk2 org..
told lynn about wat happened..
now both of them are on a quest to find me a man.. how's that??
apa2la.. me myself...tgh malas nak pikir.. ada, keluar jumpa je
takde.. so wat..
i think it's normal to be in this state after such an incident..
i wouldnt call it a trauma though.. been reading my last 2 entries.. of which one has yet to be posted.. i sound like a cerekarama..
seriously..
shah mailed..still jet lag, and planning his next oversea vacationss...i wish i can be like him..
called yea, asked her to ask me out if she happens to be nearby.. how pathetic can that be..
called win last nite too.. hmm.. wasnt in his best mood for sure.. i dunno.. dengar je suara dia macam tu.. rasa malas pulak nak ngadu.. sure kena sound balik.. i dunno.. maybe just a lame assumption.. but i dare not push my luck.. maybe i'll slow down on him.. i guess i should quit bugging him.. it could get annoying i guess.. sorry win.
(cant help thinking.. maybe he wasnt in that mood sue to his workload..maybe it's just me.. cannot help feeling like a bad person in every situation now.. hmm)
since dua tiga hari ni takleh access my own journal..
i was busy reading someone else's
came across this one.. left after reading two entries..
thought i was in for something different.. well it was hell of a different world.. though it is becoming a norm among us now.. i still..still..find this amusing... or disgusting..
went to redhill.. hey.. there were mention of me.. though i dont really know wat the writer mean there..hmm..
anyway, thx to joel n nazrul for the gesture..
i think i need to go
tok we is on the way here..
plus zohor belum lagi ni
ta!
been having problem posting my last 2 entries.. geram betul..
nanti2la.. edit n fix balik using my own pc
speaking of which.. memang confirm software problem..
the thing is i dont happen to have the recovery cd.. i dont think it went missing, never remembered having one in the first place..
asked the person to do it for me, for some charge tho..
anyway. yesterday, i was in megamall with lynn n hetz..
takde keje, shopping..(tak berhasil sangat anyway) and tgk2 org..
told lynn about wat happened..
now both of them are on a quest to find me a man.. how's that??
apa2la.. me myself...tgh malas nak pikir.. ada, keluar jumpa je
takde.. so wat..
i think it's normal to be in this state after such an incident..
i wouldnt call it a trauma though.. been reading my last 2 entries.. of which one has yet to be posted.. i sound like a cerekarama..
seriously..
shah mailed..still jet lag, and planning his next oversea vacationss...i wish i can be like him..
called yea, asked her to ask me out if she happens to be nearby.. how pathetic can that be..
called win last nite too.. hmm.. wasnt in his best mood for sure.. i dunno.. dengar je suara dia macam tu.. rasa malas pulak nak ngadu.. sure kena sound balik.. i dunno.. maybe just a lame assumption.. but i dare not push my luck.. maybe i'll slow down on him.. i guess i should quit bugging him.. it could get annoying i guess.. sorry win.
(cant help thinking.. maybe he wasnt in that mood sue to his workload..maybe it's just me.. cannot help feeling like a bad person in every situation now.. hmm)
since dua tiga hari ni takleh access my own journal..
i was busy reading someone else's
came across this one.. left after reading two entries..
thought i was in for something different.. well it was hell of a different world.. though it is becoming a norm among us now.. i still..still..find this amusing... or disgusting..
went to redhill.. hey.. there were mention of me.. though i dont really know wat the writer mean there..hmm..
anyway, thx to joel n nazrul for the gesture..
i think i need to go
tok we is on the way here..
plus zohor belum lagi ni
ta!
Sunday, 5 January 2003
hi ying
blogger still ada problem, tension betul.. getting convinced that it's just happening to me sebab tgk org lain punya updated je..
anyway, yesterday open house was fine..ramai or dtg, maybe not as many as expected but enough to send us ketar lutut by the end of the day
penat yg amat.. but puas hati
most of my guests turned up and food habis..
jo n bad were the only two brisbanites who came, oh well.. since invitation pun last minute..pepaham jelah.. org kl..
semalam i was in a bad state..
bukan sebab open house pun..
tried msging win.. to no avail.. dah tido kot..
but since dah kronik sangat, tried calling, waited for 5 tones.. then hung up
then i went thru the whole phone number list in my hp..
lagi sedih.. many frens, not many i can count on at the early hour of the morning..
kalau still bangun pun.. i'd be mad to call them and cerita2 about my (so-called) lovelife when i dont think many are aware that i used to have (or capable of having) a boyfren
gila.. takkan nak start cite from a-z, when the story has really passed z...
but i was dying to talk to someone last nite.. sebak gila dah..
then try gi mandi, maybe fresh sikit boleh tido..
oklah...fine, mandi..and yes, fresh..
TAK BOLEH TIDO
i swallowed the hard fact.. balik malaysia pun aku still takde kawan.. as in.. KAWAN
selfishfoolish me start doing the if-only thing..
if only win bukan pilot.. keje mcm org lain, esok sunday, kalau nak menyusahkan pun.. esok dia tak keje...
ni.. ntah bila2.. asyik2 terbang.. (duhh!)
if only on je dgn shah hari tu.. takde hal dah..
if only jazmi bla bla bla..
i guessed hetz would be on the line with jazlan..
yea might be out with riz..
then dgn bangang nye i called jazmi
realyrealy wanna know how he's doing
and so the familiar voice again..
tak tau byk mana kali telan air liur just to avoid crying..
but i cried.. through the whole short conversation..
maybe dia tak tau sebab memang control gila (it was damn hard by the way).. afterall he was at an open house (he was suppose to be at mine earlier..)
but he noticed my voice lain sikit..
when the conversation finally ended, i realised that the call was another selfsih act of mine
it was realy for my sake, i need to know if he's doing fine..
it didnt cross me that he would be affected by the call..
we made a promise not to call and he stick by it.. i didnt
maybe i've just clicked the refresh button to this break up thing..
i think it'll hit him once again, all over again..just like it hit me this morning, now
maybe i think to weak of him.. but i think i made him cry later last night
i could die today, if i dont go out..
but i feel too worthless to even mandi n face the world
afterall it's sunday
going out would only stressed me out
cukupla when i realised all of my guests (well except for 2..but they're guys, so that doesnt count..sexist!) are happily attached to someone..
and this morning mama tanya about them..
so ni dgn ni.. ni nak kawin bila.. oo..ni dah ade boyfren/girlfren..
the only question she didnt ask is what's happening between u n jazmi..
but since she knows that jazmi wasnt here last nite, n i havent been attending to any calls or going out for the last week.. i guessed she'd figured that out
and being a sociology/psychology graduate, i guess she knows when not to rub it in..
thank u God
hetz just called..
merissa n lynn ajak jumpa
sunday pun sundaylah... jam ke, wateva ke..
at least there's a reason for me to go mandi n put on something decent today..
ta!
hi ying
blogger still ada problem, tension betul.. getting convinced that it's just happening to me sebab tgk org lain punya updated je..
anyway, yesterday open house was fine..ramai or dtg, maybe not as many as expected but enough to send us ketar lutut by the end of the day
penat yg amat.. but puas hati
most of my guests turned up and food habis..
jo n bad were the only two brisbanites who came, oh well.. since invitation pun last minute..pepaham jelah.. org kl..
semalam i was in a bad state..
bukan sebab open house pun..
tried msging win.. to no avail.. dah tido kot..
but since dah kronik sangat, tried calling, waited for 5 tones.. then hung up
then i went thru the whole phone number list in my hp..
lagi sedih.. many frens, not many i can count on at the early hour of the morning..
kalau still bangun pun.. i'd be mad to call them and cerita2 about my (so-called) lovelife when i dont think many are aware that i used to have (or capable of having) a boyfren
gila.. takkan nak start cite from a-z, when the story has really passed z...
but i was dying to talk to someone last nite.. sebak gila dah..
then try gi mandi, maybe fresh sikit boleh tido..
oklah...fine, mandi..and yes, fresh..
TAK BOLEH TIDO
i swallowed the hard fact.. balik malaysia pun aku still takde kawan.. as in.. KAWAN
selfishfoolish me start doing the if-only thing..
if only win bukan pilot.. keje mcm org lain, esok sunday, kalau nak menyusahkan pun.. esok dia tak keje...
ni.. ntah bila2.. asyik2 terbang.. (duhh!)
if only on je dgn shah hari tu.. takde hal dah..
if only jazmi bla bla bla..
i guessed hetz would be on the line with jazlan..
yea might be out with riz..
then dgn bangang nye i called jazmi
realyrealy wanna know how he's doing
and so the familiar voice again..
tak tau byk mana kali telan air liur just to avoid crying..
but i cried.. through the whole short conversation..
maybe dia tak tau sebab memang control gila (it was damn hard by the way).. afterall he was at an open house (he was suppose to be at mine earlier..)
but he noticed my voice lain sikit..
when the conversation finally ended, i realised that the call was another selfsih act of mine
it was realy for my sake, i need to know if he's doing fine..
it didnt cross me that he would be affected by the call..
we made a promise not to call and he stick by it.. i didnt
maybe i've just clicked the refresh button to this break up thing..
i think it'll hit him once again, all over again..just like it hit me this morning, now
maybe i think to weak of him.. but i think i made him cry later last night
i could die today, if i dont go out..
but i feel too worthless to even mandi n face the world
afterall it's sunday
going out would only stressed me out
cukupla when i realised all of my guests (well except for 2..but they're guys, so that doesnt count..sexist!) are happily attached to someone..
and this morning mama tanya about them..
so ni dgn ni.. ni nak kawin bila.. oo..ni dah ade boyfren/girlfren..
the only question she didnt ask is what's happening between u n jazmi..
but since she knows that jazmi wasnt here last nite, n i havent been attending to any calls or going out for the last week.. i guessed she'd figured that out
and being a sociology/psychology graduate, i guess she knows when not to rub it in..
thank u God
hetz just called..
merissa n lynn ajak jumpa
sunday pun sundaylah... jam ke, wateva ke..
at least there's a reason for me to go mandi n put on something decent today..
ta!
Friday, 3 January 2003
dear ying,
i dunno wat's happening with blogger..or is it just my computer .. i cant seem to add anything
worst nightmare in my entore blogging life
cho found out about this blog
never thought he is that 'sophisticated' to be able to check the history to know where' i've been..
and of all days, he checked the day i didnt delete them..
murphy's law huh?
so cho...welcome
darn!
nothing could go worse than having ur little brother browsing your ejournal.. so my day yesterday was not too bad apart from the fact that cho has been reciting some of the line in my entry..
so kak ying tgh sedih la ni? :)
sheeshh..
but actually, i dont really mind..(or else i wont be here anymore), since it's not an ultimate secret that i expect to hide from the world.. or else it wont be here on the net..duhh!!
and knowing some of my frens are reading too makes it no more different.
today still kemas2 my pictures..gila babi banyak..
went through some of the ol kys pics, shit i feel old.. somehow i feel as i grow older i tend to enjoy my life less..shame on me..
they say a pic worth a thousan words.. and i guess they justify it.. lain sangat2 rasanya..
one thing i cannot afford ignoring is how i balloned up and down over the years..
geez..i was that big?? was i ever that small (ie not so big) ????
hetz called semalam, so she didnt go to spore
aling is still in spore.. has yet to wish him bday.. oh well
call petet tak dapat.. non dah balik pahang
today wll call the rest of the ppl yg nak diinvite..where i'm going to get the numbers.. God knows
shaz called yesterday eve when i was in my peaceful afternoon slumber..so i didnt gather much from the conversation, just her sis's phone number so i can pick up my stuff..
hmm...
bilik finally kemas and all the pics which are suppose to be up the wall are up the walll.
now i dunno wat to do..
buat muka sibuk2 kat dapur in a way offering assistance in a subtle way..
i guess mama didnt get it...'lunch nasik budu.. tunggu kejap lagi..
e'eh, macam aku ni kebulur sangat, asal masuk dapur cari makan.. in a way it's true but frust la jugak, hari nak rajin kena cap macam tu
i think i must have gained a few kilos since i arrived.
semalam feel semacam again
ntah..i hope he's doing ok
it sucks thinking how he's doing..sometimes i forgot that i'm part of this and suppose to be hurt and mourning myself..
as it is now.. it's all about him..
i dare not come close to think how i miss him.. instant tear factory..which in a way proves that i care for him damn a lot too.. (cho..shut up!)
hmm...thx to my pics
at least i have them to spend time on.. pathetic pathetic
oh..thx to faiz n hetz too..
it may not be much but it helps me a lot
i may sound mcm ok je
i'm trying to be la at least.. easier when i have ppl to talk to..
thx guys
ok, got to go lunch
nasik budu
one thing worries me now.. tension = makan banyak
how?
ta!
dear ying,
i dunno wat's happening with blogger..or is it just my computer .. i cant seem to add anything
worst nightmare in my entore blogging life
cho found out about this blog
never thought he is that 'sophisticated' to be able to check the history to know where' i've been..
and of all days, he checked the day i didnt delete them..
murphy's law huh?
so cho...welcome
darn!
nothing could go worse than having ur little brother browsing your ejournal.. so my day yesterday was not too bad apart from the fact that cho has been reciting some of the line in my entry..
so kak ying tgh sedih la ni? :)
sheeshh..
but actually, i dont really mind..(or else i wont be here anymore), since it's not an ultimate secret that i expect to hide from the world.. or else it wont be here on the net..duhh!!
and knowing some of my frens are reading too makes it no more different.
today still kemas2 my pictures..gila babi banyak..
went through some of the ol kys pics, shit i feel old.. somehow i feel as i grow older i tend to enjoy my life less..shame on me..
they say a pic worth a thousan words.. and i guess they justify it.. lain sangat2 rasanya..
one thing i cannot afford ignoring is how i balloned up and down over the years..
geez..i was that big?? was i ever that small (ie not so big) ????
hetz called semalam, so she didnt go to spore
aling is still in spore.. has yet to wish him bday.. oh well
call petet tak dapat.. non dah balik pahang
today wll call the rest of the ppl yg nak diinvite..where i'm going to get the numbers.. God knows
shaz called yesterday eve when i was in my peaceful afternoon slumber..so i didnt gather much from the conversation, just her sis's phone number so i can pick up my stuff..
hmm...
bilik finally kemas and all the pics which are suppose to be up the wall are up the walll.
now i dunno wat to do..
buat muka sibuk2 kat dapur in a way offering assistance in a subtle way..
i guess mama didnt get it...'lunch nasik budu.. tunggu kejap lagi..
e'eh, macam aku ni kebulur sangat, asal masuk dapur cari makan.. in a way it's true but frust la jugak, hari nak rajin kena cap macam tu
i think i must have gained a few kilos since i arrived.
semalam feel semacam again
ntah..i hope he's doing ok
it sucks thinking how he's doing..sometimes i forgot that i'm part of this and suppose to be hurt and mourning myself..
as it is now.. it's all about him..
i dare not come close to think how i miss him.. instant tear factory..which in a way proves that i care for him damn a lot too.. (cho..shut up!)
hmm...thx to my pics
at least i have them to spend time on.. pathetic pathetic
oh..thx to faiz n hetz too..
it may not be much but it helps me a lot
i may sound mcm ok je
i'm trying to be la at least.. easier when i have ppl to talk to..
thx guys
ok, got to go lunch
nasik budu
one thing worries me now.. tension = makan banyak
how?
ta!
Thursday, January 02, 2003
dear ying
happy 2003...
as usual i entered the new year watching fireworks at all places possible in klang valley n kl, klcc, damansara, sunway, bali sunway, merdeka square, shah alam.. bla bla bla.. from my 16th floor apartment..
no countdown, no huha huha.. no big deal , as it has always been since the new millenium...
i hope 2003 marks a new beginning.. in everything, career, health (/vanity??), relationship
i end my new year by ending up a relationship
me-jazmi, no more.. in fact..jazmi, no more
(i couldnt be more bold about this could i?)
had a talk with mama the evening of the last day of 2002..
felt terrible.. felt dark all over.. wateva came from her mouth was wat i expected it to be.. but certainly not wat i hoped for..
i know she's right..irritatingly right..
so without haste i called jazmi.. he has been preparing himself for this too i guess..
i cannot begin to tell how nice he has been to me all these while.. maybe too nice.. till the end of it.. till the day i said i cannot go on with this anymore..
maybe there's something wrong with us from the start... i dont think one girlfren would describe her partner as 'nice' all along..
so that's it.. no more phone calls, no more movies, no more jogging..(this i hate most)
we remain frens, how that works without communications at all i dunno..
maybe it'll take years..
so that's how i end my 2002 and a relationship that i treasure very much..
looking at it.. at least it's on good terms..
so new year..
called along to wish him happy bday but he's away in spore..and back today..so maybe call him laterlah
been spending the whole day yesterday mengemas bilik, cuci toilet n rearranging furnitures for the obvious reason of tiring myself so that i could get some sleep at night.. and oh yes.. i slept well that nite..
waking up feeling guilty thinking how jazmi is doing..
having open house this saturday..
ah, invasion..
papa's here
i'll continue later
ta!
happy 2003...
as usual i entered the new year watching fireworks at all places possible in klang valley n kl, klcc, damansara, sunway, bali sunway, merdeka square, shah alam.. bla bla bla.. from my 16th floor apartment..
no countdown, no huha huha.. no big deal , as it has always been since the new millenium...
i hope 2003 marks a new beginning.. in everything, career, health (/vanity??), relationship
i end my new year by ending up a relationship
me-jazmi, no more.. in fact..jazmi, no more
(i couldnt be more bold about this could i?)
had a talk with mama the evening of the last day of 2002..
felt terrible.. felt dark all over.. wateva came from her mouth was wat i expected it to be.. but certainly not wat i hoped for..
i know she's right..irritatingly right..
so without haste i called jazmi.. he has been preparing himself for this too i guess..
i cannot begin to tell how nice he has been to me all these while.. maybe too nice.. till the end of it.. till the day i said i cannot go on with this anymore..
maybe there's something wrong with us from the start... i dont think one girlfren would describe her partner as 'nice' all along..
so that's it.. no more phone calls, no more movies, no more jogging..(this i hate most)
we remain frens, how that works without communications at all i dunno..
maybe it'll take years..
so that's how i end my 2002 and a relationship that i treasure very much..
looking at it.. at least it's on good terms..
so new year..
called along to wish him happy bday but he's away in spore..and back today..so maybe call him laterlah
been spending the whole day yesterday mengemas bilik, cuci toilet n rearranging furnitures for the obvious reason of tiring myself so that i could get some sleep at night.. and oh yes.. i slept well that nite..
waking up feeling guilty thinking how jazmi is doing..
having open house this saturday..
ah, invasion..
papa's here
i'll continue later
ta!
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