dear ying

happy 2003...
as usual i entered the new year watching fireworks at all places possible in klang valley n kl, klcc, damansara, sunway, bali sunway, merdeka square, shah alam.. bla bla bla.. from my 16th floor apartment..
no countdown, no huha huha.. no big deal , as it has always been since the new millenium...

i hope 2003 marks a new beginning.. in everything, career, health (/vanity??), relationship
i end my new year by ending up a relationship
me-jazmi, no more.. in fact..jazmi, no more
(i couldnt be more bold about this could i?)
had a talk with mama the evening of the last day of 2002..
felt terrible.. felt dark all over.. wateva came from her mouth was wat i expected it to be.. but certainly not wat i hoped for..
i know she's right..irritatingly right..
so without haste i called jazmi.. he has been preparing himself for this too i guess..
i cannot begin to tell how nice he has been to me all these while.. maybe too nice.. till the end of it.. till the day i said i cannot go on with this anymore..
maybe there's something wrong with us from the start... i dont think one girlfren would describe her partner as 'nice' all along..
so that's it.. no more phone calls, no more movies, no more jogging..(this i hate most)
we remain frens, how that works without communications at all i dunno..
maybe it'll take years..
so that's how i end my 2002 and a relationship that i treasure very much..
looking at it.. at least it's on good terms..

so new year..
called along to wish him happy bday but he's away in spore..and back today..so maybe call him laterlah
been spending the whole day yesterday mengemas bilik, cuci toilet n rearranging furnitures for the obvious reason of tiring myself so that i could get some sleep at night.. and oh yes.. i slept well that nite..
waking up feeling guilty thinking how jazmi is doing..

having open house this saturday..
ah, invasion..
papa's here

i'll continue later

ta!